Holiday on a house boat
Can you fit an elephant on a truck with a giraffe
In 1894 the first big Coke sign was found on the side of a building located in Cartersville, Georgia, and still exists today
There is a role and function for beauty in our time.
Did ya hear about the magic tractor? It turned into a field
On an old-fashioned rotary phone,what number requires the longest turn of the dial?
If you don't want something to be public, don't post it on the Internet.
Sledding
What did the Hungarian say to the annoying kid? "You're nothing budapest!"
Our family was too strange and weird for even Santa Claus to come visit... Santa, who was jolly - but, let's face it, he was also very judgmental.
In the U.S., over one million gallons of cosmetics, drinks, and lotions are sold that contain aloe in them per year
Stream myself gaming on Twitch TV
In the board game Risk,what continent has the most territories for a player to occupy?
It's not about who likes you, it's about who you like.
Jukskei
There are twenty six sheep in the paddock 6 die how did they die and why?
Did you hear about the Native American who went to a party and drank 37 cups of tea? They found him dead the next morning in his tea pee.
On the cartoon series Scooby-Doo, Where Are You, which character usually wears an ascot?
It was cool for a couple of weeks, but how much bad golf can you play?
Mountains will crumble and temples will fall, and no man can survive its endless call. What is it?
Five thousandths of a millimeter is the tolerance of accuracy at the LEGO mould factories
When you're looking up at birds flying overhead, keep your mouth closed.
Drink champagne in France
Diorama
What do caves have? Echosystems. From my 9 year-old.
Superman The Escape rollercoaster, located in California at Six Flags Magic Mountain, goes from 0 to 100 miles per hour in only 7 seconds
On the classic TV series "Welcome Back Kotter" what subject did Mr. Kotter teach?
Participate in a LARP experience
What belongs to you but you cant see it is always ahead of you but you cant flee it?
It takes more than just a good looking body. You've got to have the heart and soul to go with it.
You never really grow up.
Geocaching
Sugar Bear (the mascot for Golden Crisps cereal) was born in 1963
To penetrate and dissipate these clouds of darkness, the general mind must be strengthened by education.
there was a man who lives in a (title) and on the 13th floor. he goes to work every day and he hates the stairs. when it is raining he goes to the 13th floor; when it is sunny he goes to the 8th floor and takes the stairs. Why is that???
In the classic tale "Moby Dick," Moby Dick is what kind of whale?
Never write in an email to someone, something which you wouldn't say to that person's face.
Triathlon
What does batman take in his whiskey? Just ice.
Have an academic article published
What's a pirates favorite letter? You think it's the "R" but it's really the "C". Happy talk like a pirate day!
Colour is not an indicator for the taste or ripeness in cranberries
In the children's book "The Little Engine That Could",what is the engine attempting to deliver?
Anxiety is love's greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds on to you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic.
You and a friend decide to have an egg spinning contest. What can be done to make sure that your egg spins the longest?
Never regret. If it's good, it's wonderful. If it's bad, it's experience.
Go skinny dipping
Tether car
It was very early Sunday morning. The preacher had just finished his prayers. All of a sudden he was shot and killed. There were three suspects: The baker, The mailman, and the storekeeper. The baker said "I was just baking my breads !" The mailman said "I was just mailing the letters!" And the storekeeper said "I was just stocking my supplies!" Who shot the preacher?
In the agency abbreviation "EEOC," the first E stands for "equal" and the second stands for what?
Colgate faced a big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries. Colgate translates into the command "go hang yourself."
What happens when a spoon and fork get into a fight? civilwar
President Bush once said that marriage is a sacred institution and should be reserved for the union of one man and one woman. If this is the case - and most Americans would agree with him on this - then I have to ask: Why is the government at all involved in marrying people?
The sun always shines above the clouds.
Visit a sauna
Soccer
Cogito Ergo Spud. I think, therefore I yam.
The worst part about celebrating another birthday is the shock that you're only as well as you are.
On March 4, 2010, baby Cecelia Marie Halpert was "born" on an emotional episode of what hit TV series?
The Koala bear is not really a bear, but is really related to the kangaroo and the wombat.
Don't judge a book by its cover, unless it has a synopsis on the back.
Radio-controlled car racing
Try a canyon swing
A man goes into an elevator and presses the 5th floor, he gets off and walks up the stairs to his apartment on the 15th floor. He does this every day. But when he is with a neighbor, he goes to the 15th floor. Why does he do it?
Republicans use think tanks to come up with a lot of their messages. The think tanks are the single worst, most undisciplined example of communication I've ever seen.
I knew this guy who was so dumb... he saw a road sign that said, "Disney Land Left", so he turned around and went home.
The first TONKA truck was made in 1947
In the classic tale "Moby Dick," Moby Dick is what kind of whale?
what has 18 legs and ctches flies?
Zoo visiting
Always block trolls.
Start my own business
What has four eyes but will never see?
A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs
The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.
A 2011 box set celebrates the 13-film collaboration between composer Danny Elfman and what film director?
How much does a truck full of bones weigh? A skeleTon
Eat food. Not too much, mostly plants.
Eat gumbo in Louisiana
Video gaming
What two accidents happen every 24 hours?
A 2008 study in "Reference Services Review" found which of these websites to be about 80% accurate?
What is the horror movie Quija rated? Quija-13
Sugar Bear (the mascot for Golden Crisps cereal) was born in 1963
I definitely spend the most money on shoes, partly because vintage footwear can be a little funky - in a bad way. I like to keep things pretty simple up top and then go weird with the shoes.
Attend a 7s or 9s tournament
Beer tasting
You're not that important; it's what you do that counts.
In the classic story "Peter Pan," what does Wendy use to reattach Peter's shadow?
What do you call a Romanian grocery clerk? Scanthesku
Each year there are approximately 20 billion coconuts produced worldwide
Money won't make you happy... but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
What can go up a chimney down, but can't go down a chimney up?
If you need cheering up, try searching online for photos of kittens.
Biology
Explore the Fjordlands National Park on foot
What do you call an Egyptian bone-setter? Cairo-practor.
Of all actions of a man's life, his marriage does least concern other people, yet of all actions of our life tis most meddled with by other people.
This is going to make you so MAD! There are three words in the English language that end in "gry". ONE is angry and the other is hungry. EveryONE knows what the third ONE means and what it stands for. EveryONE uses them everyday, and if you listened very carefully, I've given you the third word. What is it? _______gry?
Don't let the bastards grind you down.
On dress shirts,button-down,spread and tab are popular types of what?
Softball
Go ice fishing
A meteor has only destroyed one satellite, which was the European Space Agency's Olympus in 1993.
Smokers are twice as likely to develop lower back pain than non-smokers
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he gets a hole in one
A child starting kindergarten in September 2010 will ordinarily graduate from high school in what year?
The proper study of mankind is the science of design.
As light as a feather, but you can’t hold it for ten minutes. What is It?
Most things are not as bad as you think they are.
Visit the Blue Grotto
Table tennis
One out of 20 people have an extra rib
What gains a head at night but loses one at night?
The megalomaniac differs from the narcissist by the fact that he wishes to be powerful rather than charming, and seeks to be feared rather than loved. To this type belong many lunatics and most of the great men of history.
Where does the General keep his armies? In his sleevies.
A classic 1969 work by poet Maya Angelou is titled "I Know Why The Caged Bird" what?
It's not about who likes you, it's about who you like.
Embroidery
Volunteer abroad after a disaster
In the classic story "Peter Pan," what does Wendy use to reattach Peter's shadow?
Before 1928, yo-yos used to be called bandalores in the United States
We continue to recognize the greater ability of some to earn more than others. But we do assert that the ambition of the individual to obtain for him a proper security is an ambition to be preferred to the appetite for great wealth and great power.
Do you know why one side of the the V formation of geese in flight is longer than the other side? Because It has more geese in it!
i come in square package,but i'am round.i contain lots of information for your computer.handle me carefully.what am i?
Visit Ephesus
If you don't want something to be public, don't post it on the Internet.
Metalworking
Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example.
Because of its tremendous solemnity death is the light in which great passions, both good and bad, become transparent, no longer limited by outward appearences.
What letter in the alphabet can make an old coin get very valuble.
A bit in a gossip column that doesn't mention any names is often called a what?
Japanese research has concluded that moderate drinking can boost IQ levels
Practice the kama sutra with a beautiful girl
Road biking
I was organizing my desk the other day and the Entropy Police gave me a ticket for disturbing the chaos.
The Flintstones cartoon was the first thirty-minute cartoon to be aired during prime time
Why did the golfer need to buy a new pair of socks? Because he got a hole in one!
On the FDA Nutrition Facts food label,the abbreviation "DV" stands for "daily" what?
It is our moral obligation to give every child the very best education possible.
There are two kids born on the same day, they have the same parents. Same year, and same hospital. Why aren't they twins?
Don't promise what you can't deliver.
Volleyball
Play in a sporting tournament
There is a restaurant in Stockholm that only offers all-garlic products. They even have a garlic cheesecake
Success is always less funny than failure.
what has four legs but cant walk.
In the board game Risk,what continent has the most territories for a player to occupy?
Why do elephants paint their toenails red? So they can hide in cherry trees. You ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? *Then it's working*.
Never set an alarm clock unless you know how to switch it off
See a tornado
Animation
Why can't you run in a camp ground? You can only 'ran'; it's past tents.
A blacksmith works primarily with what metal?
Of all actions of a man's life, his marriage does least concern other people, yet of all actions of our life tis most meddled with by other people.
The two factories of the Jelly Belly Candy Company produces approximately 100,000 pounds of jelly beans a day. this amounts to about 1,250,000 jelly beans an hour
Until I am measured, I am not known. Yet how you miss me, When I have flown.
Keep it simple.
Orienteering
Bathe in a Turkish bathhouse
i only go up but i never come down. what am i?
2.5 cans of Spam are consumed every second in the United States
No foreigner has a place asking another people, another country, to change their constitution.
What is the cheapest part of a boat? The part with the sail in it.
In the animal kingdom, what term is used to describe the male who is the dominant member of a group?
Alway do anything for love, but don't do that.
Eat a meal at a Michelen star rated restaurant
Fishkeeping
What did the owner of the Indian restaurant say when he burned all of his bread? "Don't worry, it's a naan issue."
In the classic book "The Swiss Family Robinson," the Robinsons build a makeshift house where?
Orcas (killer whales), when traveling in groups, breathe in unison
Once I planned to write a book of poems entirely about the things in my pocket. But I found it would be too long and the age of the great epics is past.
if you are in a room that has no windows and no doors with only a mirror and table, how do you get out?
Play is the true mother of invention.
Ultimate frisbee
Attend a book signing
In the acronym SRS, a common term for automobile airbags,the letter "R" stands for what?
Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
Why did the bird go to the doctor? He had a tweetment.
Two men were in a desert, one injured, and one not. The injured one had something in his backpack, and the other one did not. What happened?
Elizabeth Taylor has appeared on the cover of Life magazine more than anyone else
A lot of people are like, 'So you want to be famous.' And I'm like, 'No, I want to be good at my craft. I don't care about fame, I don't care if I even ever make it. As long as people know what I am as an actress in this business, I'm set for my career right now.'
Hike the Torres del Paine
Fashion design
Go on a canoe safari
My mom loved to sing - and I'll go on record and say she was the worst singer ever. I'd get up and move away from her!
On the human body, the intercostal muscles are located where?
The typical lead pencil can draw a line that is thirty five miles long
If someone is throwing a ball and no one else is aound and the ball comes back to them. How is this possible.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crumbly.
If it ain't broke don't fix it.
Bus spotting
In the acronym SRS, a common term for automobile airbags,the letter "R" stands for what?
Kind of a kid joke What kind of cereal do zombies like? Kellog's All Brain
You cant see me but sometimes you hear me and in a hurricane some people fear me
Mars is the home of Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in our solar system
Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great. Weak men wait for opportunities strong men make them.
It's not about who likes you, it's about who you like.
Witchcraft
Visit Los Glaciares National Park
What does Mario use to get his hot dogs off the grill? He uses his Donkey Tongs.
The Flintstones cartoon was the first thirty-minute cartoon to be aired during prime time
A cast member of the AMC series "Hell On Wheels," rapper/actor Lonnie Lynn, Jr. is better known by what stage name?
The agony of my feelings allowed me no respite no incident occurred from which my rage and misery could not extract its food.
If You had A Gamecube, And Super Smash Bros Meelee, and Link: The Four Swords, who would beat them all?
Stop procrastinating.
Visit the 10 Biggest Theme Parks in the World
Astronomy
A classic 1976 song by Blue Oyster Cult features the advice "Don't Fear The" what?
See a ghost
President Ford was a devoted, decent man of impeccable integrity who put service to his country before his own self interest. He helped heal our nation during a time of crisis, provided steady leadership and restored people's faith in the presidency and in government.
More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes
What do you get if you cross an elephant with a fish? Swimming trunks
(it was around 1724)Jonny Apple Seed was trudgeing down the feilds when all of a sudden he fell and was dead. Why???
Don't give a speech. Put on a show.
Leaves
The person who never made a mistake never made anything.
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, 'You're tearing up the grass' 'We're not raising grass,' Dad would reply. 'We're raising boys.'
In the classic Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons,Rocky is what type of animal?
Humans are born with 300 bones in their body, however when a person reaches adulthood they only have 206 bones. This occurs because many of them join together to make a single bone
What did the space between two tiles say? I AM GROUT
If you were singing in a meadow and there was a river full of fish, and the song you were singing was forgotten and lost, where did your song go?
Massaging
Learn to surf
Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative.
How did Hitler tie his shoelaces? In cute little knotsies!
What sculpture is to a block of marble, education is to the soul.
The Gastric Flu can cause projectile vomiting
What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time and space, the beginning of the end, and the end of every race.
On the children's TV "Dora the Explorer," Dora's best friend Boots is what kind of animal?
Do a keg-stand
Photography
What did the hot dogs name their child? Frank.
On an '80s TV series, a plucky orphan named Penelope Brewster was better known as what?
The abbreviation Xmas for the word Christmas is of Greek origin. Since the word for Christ in the Greek language is Xristos, which starts with the letter "X," they started putting the X in place of Christ and came up with the short form for the word Christmas
Heres a Riddle you dont know... Even if I tell you so, There is a M in Mississippi, There is an r in race, There is a E in ear, Which two are wrong?
Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
Recipe creation
Lemon and salt works wonders on tarnished brass.
Travel by helicopter
what is brown and sticky
In the children's book "The Little Engine That Could",what is the engine attempting to deliver?
Of married couples, 70% of men and 60% of women have cheated on their spouse
Have you heard what I think of windmills? Big Fan.
The regular guy still relates to him and Howard is a $500 million guy now who dates a model and drives about in a limo all day. But Howard still knows how to make a plumber laugh and those guys still have him on in the morning, because he is a real talent.
There is no reason at all to believe that White Wine is any different to water when it comes to removing Red Wine stains.
Water polo
Visit the Killing Fields
What kind of turns do letters take? U-turns!
One night, the king and queen go on a cruise ship. The next day, 3 people get off the ship. Who's the 3rd person?
A 2006 study of phone conversations found that which statement was meant sarcastically 23 percent of the time?
Smokers are twice as likely to develop lower back pain than non-smokers
If we survive danger it steels our courage more than anything else.
Don't assume anything is possible or impossible until you've asked the people who will be doing the work.
Public transport riding
Paint or sketch somebody’s portrait
In the classic arcade game Centipede,players battle all but which of these deadly creatures?
What has eyes but can't see, a tongue but can't talk, and a soul but can never find love?
I had dreams of catching the ball for the final out in the World Series and being mobbed by my teammates. Well, I guess all my dreams didn't come true.
The Planters Peanut Company mascot, Mr. Peanut, was created during a contest for schoolchildren in 1916
What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
Writing music
Have a whirlwind romance on the road
Always block trolls.
In 1967, the IMAX film system was invented by Canadian Ivan Grame Ferguson to premier at Expo 67.
In the acronym SRS, a common term for automobile airbags,the letter "R" stands for what?
The hole in the boat So two guys steal a boat and get drunk. One of them goes "Hey, there is a hole in this boat". The other says "don't worry it's not ours".
And a special thank you to the citizens of Massachusetts: You are paying all the taxes, creating all the jobs, raising all the children. This government is yours. Thank you for letting me serve you. I love this job.
I'm a god, a planet, and measurer of heat. Who am I?
Try to do the things that you're incapable of.
Photography
Attend a boxing match
Don't try and bump start a motorcycle on an icy road.
Mars is the home of Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in our solar system
A classic 1976 song by Blue Oyster Cult features the advice "Don't Fear The" what?
Education is not to reform students or amuse them or to make them expert technicians. It is to unsettle their minds, widen their horizons, inflame their intellects, teach them to think straight, if possible.
A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? You make a seizure salad!
Weaving
Coach a sports team
My brother likes driving black and white F1 race cars. They call him the F1 racist.
A bit in a gossip column that doesn't mention any names is often called a what?
What holds water yet is full of holes?
Instead of a Birthday Cake, many Russian children are given a Birthday Pie
Complete the Overland Trek in Cradle Mountain National Park
Alcohol is like love. The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you take the girl's clothes off.
Things are just things. Don't get too attached to them.
Refinishing
The Tonle Sap River in Cambodia flows north for almost half the year and then south for the rest of the year
In the classic arcade game Centipede,players battle all but which of these deadly creatures?
Going to a party, for me, is as much a learning experience as, you know, sitting in a lecture.
1 plate 12 bowls 3 spoons. Who am I
Lemon and salt works wonders on tarnished brass.
How did the musician catch his fish? He castanet
Airbrushing
Visit Ayutthaya
Max wondered why the ball was slowly growing larger... and then it hit him.
Five thousandths of a millimeter is the tolerance of accuracy at the LEGO mould factories
A blacksmith works primarily with what metal?
Love and doubt have never been on speaking terms.
Stop procrastinating.
Perform a magic trick
Fruit picking
what do you get when you combine roller skates & a rocking chair.
There are six million parts in the Boeing 747-400.
How much does a Chinese elephant weigh? Wonton
In the children's rhyme "This Little Piggy," where did the first little piggy go?
You can feel me but you cannot touch me What am i?
I may be the prat in the hat, that's cool, but I drive an Aston Martin DB5.
Speed skating
See Thor’s Well in action
Respect other people's opinions, even when they differ from your own.
What did one wall say to the other wall? I`ll meet you at the corner.
On the human body, the area of skin known as "The T-zone" is located where?
In 1631, two London bible printers accidentally left the word "not" out of the seventh commandment, which then read, "Thou shalt commit adultery." This legendary book is now known as the "Wicked Bible."
I never can go up, I'm always coming down. Increasing my speed at first, then decreasing near the ground.
My view is that good community management is like having good municipal government: You should be able to have dissenting opinions and so on, freedom of speech, but your grandmother should also be able to walk down the street at night without having to worry about getting mugged.
See a polar bear in the wild
Remember that spiders are more afraid of you, than you are of them.
Reading
It has a bed but dosen't sleep, it has a mouth but never eats and it is always running, never walks.
The Tonle Sap River in Cambodia flows north for almost half the year and then south for the rest of the year
`Famous for their work on modernist furniture design, Charles and Ray Eames were related how?
Broom advocates for cleaner work environment.
I loved history because to me, history was like watching a movie.
Do not seek praise, seek criticism.
Geocaching
Visit the Killing Fields
The word "toy" comes from an old English word that means "tool."
On the human body, the intercostal muscles are located where?
Overheated some milk in a lab experiment today... ...and asked the teacher if it would affect the result. Her response? "To a degree."
The hardest of all is learning to be a well of affection, and not a fountain to show them we love them not when we feel like it, but when they do.
State the problem in words as clearly as possible.
Barbershop Music
Pan for gold/Go fossicking
a husband and a wife bought 20 carrots and chrished those carrots forever. The nicknamed the carrots their pets. after 10 years the carrots got old and then the husband and wife got rid of them. after they got rid of them they very rich, how is this possible?
Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine and at last you create what you will.
What kind of pants does Super Mario wear? [Denim, denim, denim.]
On December 21, 1864, General Sherman's famous "March to the Sea" concluded with the capture of what Southern city?
2.5 cans of Spam are consumed every second in the United States
See Victoria Falls
One day there was a deadly car crash on the highway. No one was around when the car crashed and all 6 passengers inside were killed. When the police arrived and began to examine the scene, they found 7 hearts and 15 kidneys. How is this possible?
Hacking
Try going commando to an important meeting, NB: don't wear a skirt.
What did the bunny say to the frog? My name is Rabbit, not ribbit!!
On the 2010 Forbes 400 list, what billionaire identifies himself as residing in Medina, Washington?
You have citizens who don't understand how government works and they're kind of soured on it. All they do is criticize. They have no idea that they can make things happen.
Humans are born with 300 bones in their body, however when a person reaches adulthood they only have 206 bones. This occurs because many of them join together to make a single bone
Take one out and scratch my head I once was black but now am red!
Attend the Mass Games in North Korea
Meditation
Rule number 1: Try not to die. Rule number 2: Don't be a dick.
Men in their early twenties shave an average of four times a week
The word FACETIOUSLY contains the six vowels, A-E-I-O-U and Y, in their alphabetical order. Can you find another English word that does the same?
All the arguments which are brought to represent poverty as no evil show it evidently to be a great evil.
How many ears does Captain Picard have? A right ear. A left ear. And a final front ear.
A 1985 North Atlantic expedition led by Robert Ballard discovered the wreck of what famous ship 73 years after it sank?
Do, or do not. There is no try.
Visit Hong Kong
Humor
Not all polar bears hibernate; only pregnant females polar bears do
On the 2010 Forbes 400 list, what billionaire identifies himself as residing in Medina, Washington?
Two wrongs don't make a right... but three lefts make a right. And two Wrights make a plane 6 lefts make a plane.
God's plan for enlarging His kingdom is so simple - one person telling another about the Savior. Yet we're busy and full of excuses. Just remember, someone's eternal destiny is at stake. The joy you'll have when you meet that person in heaven will far exceed any discomfort you felt in sharing the gospel.
When in doubt, just take the next small step.
Butterfly watching
Visit the oldest manmade structures in Brittany
Swim with dolphins in the wild
NASCAR stands for National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing
When the people fear the government, there is tyranny. When the government fears the people, there is liberty.
In the classic Mark Twain novel,Tom Sawyer lives in a small town located near what river?
Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot is faster. Anyone can catch a cold.
What is special bout the word "FOUR"?
Motorcycling
Value the people in your life.
In the AAMCO song, when does the double beep occur.
The typical lead pencil can draw a line that is thirty five miles long
Why did the tissue get up and dance? It had a little boogy in it.
The assumption is that the right kind of society is an organic being not merely analogous to an organic being, but actually a living structure with appetites and digestions, instincts and passions, intelligence and reason.
If it still itches after a week, go to the doctors.
Embroidery
Kiss somebody under mistletoe
Who are the two brothers who live on opposite sides of the road yet never see each other?