Persistent people begin their success where others end in failure.
What do you call someone who majors in geology and astronomy A rockstar
The submission of her body without love or desire is degrading to the woman's finer sensibility, all the marriage certificates on earth to the contrary notwithstanding.
All my 5 senses are perfect.But I can't run play tennis or do any type of Athletics the only thing i can do in Athletics is Throw a ball in a hoop. Why can't I do any type of activity(athletics)?
Why don't bears wear boots? Because they like to walk around in their bear feet.
I don't know the first real thing about the dating game. I don't know how to talk to a specific person and connect. I just think you have to go to person by person and do the best you can with people in general.
Run an obstacle course
Does this dinosaur exist? This dinosaur is purple and green. It's name starts with a letter "B". It has 6 letters in its name. It makes kids happy. Does this dinosaur exist?If so, what is it?
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
Lovers may be - and indeed generally are - enemies, but they never can be friends, because there must always be a spice of jealousy and a something of Self in all their speculations.
what will break if u will do anything?
A man may devote himself to death and destruction to save a nation but no nation will devote itself to death and destruction to save mankind.
Flying disc
Whats black, white and red all over
Do not separate text from historical background. If you do, you will have perverted and subverted the Constitution, which can only end in a distorted, bastardized form of illegitimate government.
how many animals can fit in pantyhose
Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Prize? He was outstanding in his field.
We have wasted History like a bunch of drunks shooting dice back in the men's crapper of the local bar.
A man was found dead with 52 bicycles lying on top of him. How did he die?
All we can do when we think of kids today is think of more hours of school, earlier age at the computer, and curfews. Who would want to grow up in that world?
Seven days without a joke makes one weak.
Dreaming in public is an important part of our job description, as science writers, but there are bad dreams as well as good dreams. We're dreamers, you see, but we're also realists, of a sort.
I start with the letter e. And end with the letter e. I am only have one letter. What am I?
Directly after the show people might have responded better to it, but who really knows. It did what it did and while it seems like a failure to most but it was a success for me and has given me so many opportunities.
Rearrange the following letters to make just one word. STOODUWERNJ
What I do is not some magical, mystical thing. I simply get up in the morning, get to work on time, say my lines, and do the best I can.
What did the wall ask the picture? (All together now!) ***"How's it hangin'?"***
There is a path through the woods. It goes in one side, and out the other. How far can you walk in?
I could have been an architect, but I don't think I'd have been very happy. Nearly all modern architecture is a silly game as far as I can see.
How can you see the old woman crossing the street when your driving if the moon is out but the trees are blocking the light,your headlights are broken and not a street light is on?
The number of illegal activities were so large that one was bound to come out and lead to the uncovering of the others. Nixon was too willing to use the power of government to settle scores and get even with enemies.
What are twins favorite fruits? Pears
theres a guy on sunny days to get to his office on the 45 floor he takes the elevator to the 25 floor. on rainny days he goes up to the 45 floor in the elovator. how come he doesnt use the whole elavator ride on sunny days?
What do you call an alien in a swamp? A MARSHian
Living the past is a dull and lonely business looking back strains the neck muscles, causing you to bump into people not going your way.
Being a Hot Mom means being respected as a mom and a woman. And, the key to being a Hot Mom is having a sense of humor about yourself and all the crazy situations that arise.
You actually don't want people thinking your product is cool, because then you're a fad.
Music is something that always lifts my spirits and makes me happy, and when I make music I always hope it will have the same effect on whoever listens to it.
Intelligence we gathered at the time indicated that this was in fact leadership and we struck the leadership.
My first letter is in contagious, but not in dangerous. My second letter is in outrageous, but not in justified. My third letter is in wonderful, but not in horrible. My fourth letter is in awesome, but not in gorgeous. My fifth letter is in random, but not in against. My last letter is in denied, but not in access and I shrink from any kind of danger or fear. What am I?
Give a speech at a friend’s wedding
Why couldn't Joe be friends with a double-amputee? Because he's lack-toes intolerant.
Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it the seed on an equal or greater benefit.
I see without seeing. Noise is an ally. What am I?
I was framed, yet I didn't commit a crime, and the person who framed me committed no crime. How is this possible?
We don't walk. We overeat because we've made it easy to overeat. We have fast-food joints on every corner. By the way, the 'we' is all of us. It's not the government. It's all of us doing this together.
Physical courage is a great test.
The greatest enemy to human souls is the self-righteous spirit which makes men look to themselves for salvation.
How do you drop and egg five feet without it breaking?
Get kinkg with some BDSM
Jazz can be so serious, no sense of humor.
Surf in Hawaii
I just bought a Bonnie Tyler sat-nav. It keeps telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart.
To see your friend's dreams come true, there's really nothing that can make you happier.
What two things can you never eat for breakfast?
Testing oneself is best when done alone.
i guy was born in 1885 and he is still alive now.how is that.
We have domesticated God's transcendence. We often learn about God at about the same time as we are learning about Santa Claus but our ideas about Santa Claus change, mature and become more nuanced, whereas our ideas of God can remain at a rather infantile level.
when do u go on red and stop on green?
Why don't blind people like skydiving? It scares the crap out of the dog.
I am a grandmother now, and that means age is creeping on, creeping on.
There's a quarter named Billy, his sister is a dime named Dime, his brother is a nickel named Nickel, and his mom is a penny named Penny. what is the quarter's name
There's been some research in cognitive science, I'm told, that discloses that there have always been perhaps 10 to 15 percent of people who are, as Pascal puts it, so made that they cannot believe. To us, when people talk about faith, it's white noise.
There is a plane that crashes on the border of California and Arizona. Where do you bury the survivors?
What's red and is bad for your teeth? A brick
2 dads and 2 sons go fishing, they each catch a fish but there were 3 fish caught.How is that?
The body is a house of many windows: there we all sit, showing ourselves and crying on the passers-by to come and love us.
If you keep thinking about what you want to do or what you hope will happen, you don't do it, and it won't happen.
While I was going to London I met a men with 7 wives,7 sacks,7 kids and 7 cats, kis,cats,sacks and wives. how many were going to London?
There's something about death that is comforting. The thought that you could die tomorrow frees you to appreciate your life now.
A man who lives on the 30th floor of an apartment goes all the way down to the 1st floor on an elevator. However, he only goes up to the 15th floor, then walks the rest of the way on the stairs. But when it rains, he rides up to the 30th floor. Why does he do that?
What do you say to the Montana barista when they overfill your chamomile? Beautiful
When you have got an elephant by the hind legs and he is trying to run away, it's best to let him run.
I still watch 'Idol,' and it's still the No. 1 show, so obviously I'm not the only one who loves to sit at home and be entertained.
if you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes are in the doghouse?
We had great faith that with patience, understanding, and education, that my family and I could be helpful in changing their minds and attitudes around.
Nick timed himself and found out that if he wore a bright white outfit he ran 20 miles in 80 minutes, but when he wore a dark outfit, he ran 20 miles in one hour and twenty minutes. What does this mean for his next race?
Friendship without self-interest is one of the rare and beautiful things of life.
Visit Bhutan
You know, all that really matters is that the people you love are happy and healthy. Everything else is just sprinkles on the sundae.
I am something some people have. I am something some people don't. Without me your time of living is dull. Yet i can never be seen but be told you have none by someone. What am i?
The majority of men meet with failure because of their lack of persistence in creating new plans to take the place of those which fail.
What can you catch but cant throw?
Roller derby
Once you can accept failure, you can have fun and success.
I am at the beginning of all things. I am at the end of eternity. There is but one path from my beginning to my end. My whole embodies indifference. What am I?
Visit Shanghai
Legislation passed in the aftermath of September 11, 2001 enhanced our intelligence capabilities and strengthened our national defense, but until now our nation's immigration policies have not adapted to the needs of a post-September 11th world.
I went across the london Bridge to see me sister Sally. I tipped my hat and drew my cane now tell me what is my name??
I was always a dreamer, in childhood especially. People thought I was a little strange.
Today I'm 45. But with the wind chill I feel like 32.
I am someone you use everyday. You always walk in it. what am I?
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.
Upcycling
Visit the Kigali Memorial Centre
You have a bottle of random shape and you want to fill HALF of it with water. You have available only a pump with unlimited water. Nothing else. How will you fill it?
What Did Delaware? A brand New Jersey!
Imparting knowledge is only lighting other men's candles at our lamp without depriving ourselves of any flame.
Crocheting
1 11 21 1211 111221 312211 13112221 1113213211 31131211131221 13211311123113112211 What number comes next?
All my movies got screwed up because of my personality.
loco guys go crazy wat if u wer 1 wud u die or live?
The thing with me is, if I wake up one morning and I'm not happy working as an actress, I'll stop. It's not something I have to do. It's not a vocation.
Why did the chicken cross the playground??
A friendship can weather most things and thrive in thin soil but it needs a little mulch of letters and phone calls and small, silly presents every so often - just to save it from drying out completely.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth? Decaffeinated
you have 3 houses next to eachother. each house has 1 power source of 1 of the following -water -gas -electric how do u get all of these into each house and NOT over lap or cross lines?
Me have great grammar... Me learnt everything I know from Sesame Street!
I'd do pretty much anything to get back on stage. I'd like to develop a new musical. I nearly had a heart attack when I heard that they're developing John Waters' Cry-Baby because that is so amazing and super and wonderful and I wish that I could be involved. But it's not the right time and I understand that. But I hear things like that and I get that little tingle in my stomach.
The guy that makes it dont want it, the guy that buys it dont need it, the guy that uses it never sees it.....WHAT AM I ??
I know my country has not perfected itself. At times, we've struggled to keep the promise of liberty and equality for all of our people. We've made our share of mistakes, and there are times when our actions around the world have not lived up to our best intentions.
Why did the chicken did not cross the road?