I'm a strong person, I'm a strong family man, I'm a strong husband and a strong father.
How many months have 28 days
In 1810, Peter Durand invented the tin can for preserving food
In the classic Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons,Rocky is what type of animal?
Couch surfing
What happened when porky pig fell asleep at his construction job? The foreman fired him, saying, 'We can't have bored boars boring boards.'
Visit Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre
Most things done in secrecy are better left undone.
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
A bushel is a standard unit originally used to measure the weight of what?
History is one of those marvelous and necessary illusions we have to deal with. It's one of the ways of dealing with our world with impossible generalities which we couldn't live without.
Pucks hit by hockey sticks have reached speeds of up to 150 miles per hour
test
Do not compare yourself with others.
Visit Los Glaciares National Park
Fossicking
My finger became really swollen after I jammed it Friday. And thats how I found out Im allergic to jam.
The reason why hair turns gray as we age is because the pigment cells in the hair follicle start to die, which is responsible for producing "melanin" which gives the hair colour
Why did i steal my neighbour's avocado with a green glove?
Clear thinking requires courage rather than intelligence.
On the Great Seal of the United States,the eagle holds in its beak a scroll bearing what Latin phrase?
Race walking
Everybody makes mistakes.
See a show in Las Vegas
But whatever my failure, I have this thing to remember - that I was a pioneer in my profession, just as my grandfathers were in theirs, in that I was the first man in this section to earn his living as a writer.
A bit in a gossip column that doesn't mention any names is often called a what?
Before 1928, yo-yos used to be called bandalores in the United States
Wanna hear a joke about Nitric Oxide ? NO
I can be created by humans, but they cannot control me. I suck on wood, paper and flesh alike. I can be more of a hindrance than help. To my creators, I seem to be everywhere at once. What am I?
Quality beats quantity.
Kite flying
Have a debauched boy’s weekend in a country other than my own
In 1894 the first big Coke sign was found on the side of a building located in Cartersville, Georgia, and still exists today
I give you a group of three. One is sitting down, and will never get up. The second eats as much as is given to him, yet is always hungry. The third goes away and never returns.
Like when I host a party. I hope my guests get along. But if not, how interesting!
A 1952 episode of "I Love Lucy was titled "Lucy Is Enceinte" because what English word was censored?
What did earth say to the other planets? You guys have no life!
It's always the quiet ones.
Sleep in an underground hotel
Reviewing Gadgets
Why did the scarecrow go to the doctor? He had straw-itch.
A monkey was once tried and convicted for smoking a cigarette in South Bend, Indiana
On December 21, 1864, General Sherman's famous "March to the Sea" concluded with the capture of what Southern city?
What would you rather, a crocodile attack you, or an alligator?
Common sense and history tell you that rewarding illegal behavior will only encourage more of it.
When the cistern is filling, the seat is probably still warm.
Craft
Sit on a jury
With thieves I consort, With the vilest, in short, I'm quite at ease in depravity; Yet all divines use me, And savants can't lose me, For I am the center of gravity
How do you make a computer your best friend? You buy it a nice bunch of software and get it loaded!
A bit of folk wisdom warns that when you point a finger at someone, how many fingers are pointing back at you?
To the man who loves art for its own sake, it is frequently in its least important and lowliest manifestations that the keenest pleasure is to be derived.
Fly a stunt plane with U Fly Xtreme
Once you find a really good friend don't do anything that could mess up your friendship.
Shooting sports
Asthma affects one in fifteen children under the age of eighteen
What kind of turns do letters take? U-turns!
On March 4, 2010, baby Cecelia Marie Halpert was "born" on an emotional episode of what hit TV series?
The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth is called Arachibutyrophobia
The best prophet of the future is the past.
Attend the Rugby League World Cup
Im squidgy and im soft, i bounce a lot.One thing i cant do is move around.What am i?
No "brand" is your friend.
Sled dog racing
there is an airplane and it crashes! Every single person dies, but there are some survivors. HOW?
Human societies, like human beings, live by faith and die when faith dies.
Drive a lap in a race car
Each year there are approximately 20 billion coconuts produced worldwide
On the classic sitcom "Happy Days," what was the name of Richie's practical joke-loving buddy,played by actor Don Most?
Did you hear about the homemade poison ivy remedy? You can make it from scratch.
Repeat people's names when you meet them.
Cleaning
Chinese Crested dogs can get acne
On the human body, the intercostal muscles are located where?
Personality is everything in art and poetry.
What's wide at the bottom, narrow at the top, and has ears?
Where did the cat go when it lost it's tail? To the retail store!
Vinegar is a powerful cleaning agent.
Go Guerilla Camping
rowing
A train was on its way to Florida and derailed. Where would they bury the survivors?
A woman has the age she deserves.
In the business abbreviation "R & D," the "R" stands for what?
The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth is called Arachibutyrophobia
How long did it take for the police to catch the man running in his underwear? It was a brief chase...
If you have grandparents or parents - Talk to them more. Ask them about their life experiences.
Drawing
Visit the Blue Mosque
Soap addiction I used to be addicted to soap. But I'm clean now!!
NASCAR stands for National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing
My dad was a workaholic. I saw him work seven days a week.
A child starting kindergarten in September 2010 will ordinarily graduate from high school in what year?
A man and his son, John, were driving to a movie theater. Halfway to the theater, they get in a car crash. The man is dies and John is sent to a hospital. He is taken into surgery. When the doctor looked at John, the doctor says " I can't operate on him. He is my son John." Who was the doctor?
If you're feeling tired or anxious, a pint of water will almost always make you feel better.
Go parasailing
Art
You live in a one story house and everything is red! what color is the sink,toilet,kitchen,walls, and stairs?
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times
Secrecy, being an instrument of conspiracy, ought never to be the system of a regular government.
In the abbreviation for the medical procedure popularly known as an MRI,what does the "I' stand for?
Where does the General keep his armies? In his sleevies.
Knitting
Visit Saint Basil’s Cathedral
Always the burrito.
What does a train full of grain's whistle sound like? "COUS, COUS!!!"
A bill of fare is more commonly known as a what?
In 1631, two London bible printers accidentally left the word "not" out of the seventh commandment, which then read, "Thou shalt commit adultery." This legendary book is now known as the "Wicked Bible."
I'm a movie nut. I go to the movies probably twice a week, and if I'm not doing anything at night, I'm usually watching a movie or two.
I never was, yet aleays will be. I am never seen, Yet always come. I can carry nothing, Yet holf much for some...what am I?
Everyone has their down days. Don't take it out on innocent bystanders.
Visit Cartagena
Memory training
The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth is called Arachibutyrophobia
What do you call a camel in Alaska? Lost.
many people in a box
In the business abbreviation "R & D," the "R" stands for what?
Be strong, believe in freedom and in God, love yourself, understand your sexuality, have a sense of humor, masturbate, don't judge people by their religion, color or sexual habits, love life and your family.
Picnicking
Try acupuncture
Why wait until valentines day for a romantic gesture?
It is shaped like an L at the rite angle, Has 3,4,5 or 6 legs to hold it stable, has arms that hold the pain of men, and they use it again and again.
A caramel candy brand since 1903,Werther's Original is named after a town in the Westphalia region of what country?
The typical lead pencil can draw a line that is thirty five miles long
What do you call beef that's been burned? A mis-steak.
God help those who do not help themselves.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
Visit the Whitsundays
Birdwatching
Plant a tree.
If the red house is on the left and the blue house is on the right, wheres the white house?
Why does a chicken coupe only have two doors? If it had four it'd be a chicken sedan!
In the British royal family,which of the following is not the name of one of Prince Charles's three siblings?
The word "comet" comes from the Greek word "kometes" meaning long hair and referring to the tail
Mineral collecting
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die.
Spend a weekend at a Buddhist retreat
In the classic folk song "On Top of Old Smoky," what is "Old Smoky"?
In 1894 the first big Coke sign was found on the side of a building located in Cartersville, Georgia, and still exists today
About astrology and palmistry: they are good because they make people vivid and full of possibilities. They are communism at its best. Everybody has a birthday and almost everybody has a palm.
I am six letters. When you take one away I am twelve. What am I?
What do you call a woman with one leg? Eileen
You can fail at what you don't want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.
Metal detecting
Visit Kakadu
Cinderella is known as Rashin Coatie in Scotland, Zezolla in Italy, and Yeh-hsien in China
I travel all around the world but I always stay in a corner. What am I?
Why do abcdefghijklmopqrstuvwxyz hate hanging out with the letter n? Because n always has to be the center of attention.
On the classic TV series "The Brady Bunch,"what is the name of the Brady family dog?
Life can be a lot more interesting inside your head.
Ride in a submarine
Bonsai
A great artist is a great man in a great child.
What's an atheist's favorite Christmas movie? Coincidence on 34th Street
A 20th-century fashion icon, Gabrielle Chanel was better known by what nickname?
In 1960 there were 16,067 gambling slots in Nevada. By 1999, this number rose to 205,726 slots which would be one slot for every 10 people residing there
Accept business only at a price permitting thoroughness. Then do a thorough job, regardless of cost to us.
if a cowboy leaves on Friday, stays 3 days, and came back on Friday. How is this possible?
Walking is a perfectly valid solution to traffic congestion problems.
Cricket
Visit Jejudo
Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny.
Witness the Hong Kong Harbour Lights Show
what weighs more a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers??
The word "toy" comes from an old English word that means "tool."
As long as I can make lots of money in other businesses, I'll continue to subsidize my own work.
In the climactic prom scene of the 1976 film "Carrie," the title character is doused with the blood of what farm animal?
Things are just things. Don't get too attached to them.
Bodybuilding
The "naked recreation and travel" industry has grown by 233% in the past decade
In the Bizet opera, "Carmen," the flirtatious Carmen works in what type of establishment?
Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? To reach the high school.
tear one off and scratch my head what once was red is black instead
I burnt myself out of skating. I was ready to focus on being a mom.
Don't drink bleach.
Go on a brewery crawl
Soccer
Enjoy a little nonsense now and then.
A 2008 study in "Reference Services Review" found which of these websites to be about 80% accurate?
What is fish colour?
What type of doctor prescribes Coke and 7-up for a living? A Poptometrist!
Mars is the home of Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in our solar system
I think it makes people in the Pentagon kind of nervous to know that chemical agents and environmental factors could cause so much damage in terms of what may happen in the future.
Visit the Boudhanath Stupa
Gymnastics
Which whiskey should you buy if you want to dance all night? Wild Twerky!
You come home, climb the stairs, turn out the light and go to bed. In the morning, you wake up, look out the window and commit suicide. What is your profession?
The deepest mine in the world is the East Rand mine, which goes to a depth of about 3,585 metres
Redemption just means you just make a change in your life and you try to do right, versus what you were doing, which was wrong.
On the 2010 Forbes 400 list, what billionaire identifies himself as residing in Medina, Washington?
Try going commando to an important meeting, NB: don't wear a skirt.
Participate in the Darwin Beer Regatta or the Henley on Todd Regatta
rowing
Kids, I don't know if our ceiling is the best ceiling... but it's definitely up there.
a man and his son are on a motorcycle and are driving on the highway when they crash the father dies but the son is rushed to the hospital when he got there the doctor exclaimed"i cant operate on this boy! he is my son" how can this be?
In a day, kids in the U.S. that are between the ages of 2 - 8 spend 28 minutes of their time coloring
There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them.
In the Charles Dickens novel "A Christmas Carol," what is the last name of the young Tiny Tim?
Do not compare yourself with others.
Travel the Karakorum Highway
Livestreaming
The word "toy" comes from an old English word that means "tool."
Which whiskey should you buy if you want to dance all night? Wild Twerky!
In the classic book "The Swiss Family Robinson," the Robinsons build a makeshift house where?
The best teamwork comes from men who are working independently toward one goal in unison.
What are the science teacher's favorite states?
Share positive energy.
Mazes (indoor/outdoor)
Drink sake in Japan
What did the dad buffalo say when his offspring left for college? Bison
If you're driving down the road and your doors fall off how many macoroni noodles does it take to find a garaff in the back neck of the woods eating a tree with a rino stuck in it, How it got up there i dont know.
The Gastric Flu can cause projectile vomiting
A 1995 documentary subtitled "Hollywood Madam" examines the rise and fall of what scandalous figure?
I'm a pessimist because of intelligence, but an optimist because of will.
When you're at a concert or event, enjoy the moment, enjoy being there. Try leaving your camera in your pocket.
Sculling
Have an awesome costume for a Zombie Walk
I know a lot of people dread going to work every morning, but my work is playing pretend and doing stunts and screaming. It's a lot of fun and I get to play dress up. Every day is exciting and different and new and cool. I couldn't be more grateful.
A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs
What do you find in a cloud's shorts? Thunderpants!
In the animal kingdom, what term is used to describe the male who is the dominant member of a group?
thirty white horses on a white hill first they clamp then they stamp then they stand still
Don't always believe what you think.
Fossil hunting
Have a whirlwind romance on the road
The scientists a scientist went to a remote island with a dog in order to teach his speaking. Three years later, the scientist returns, and is asked about his experiment; he replied "woof, woof, woof"
ther is a man called jon wot is his mum called
Irish women are always carrying water on their heads, and always carrying their husbands home from pubs. Such things are the greatest posture-builders in the world.
Don't try and bump start a motorcycle on an icy road.
Japanese research has concluded that moderate drinking can boost IQ levels
A Boston native,what late night host's sister made her film debut as one of the Eklund sisters in "The Fighter"?
Aquascaping
Start my own magazine
Why are some chillies nosy? They're jalapeno business.
A clarsach-a traditional Irish musical instrument-is a kind of what?
For more than 3,000 years, Carpenter ants have been used to close wounds in India, Asia and South America
The victim is the father of the son of the judge. What is the relationship between the victim and the judge?
Illegal drug use runs contrary to the image of health depicted by cycling. Distributors of these drugs must be prosecuted more harshly as they are ciminals.
Visitors are like fish: As much as you might like them, after three days they start to smell.
Gymnastics
Make the pilgrimage to Jerusalem
But the best thing Washington can do for education is realize that our role is limited. Washington must keep its promises, but let those who know our childrens' names- parents, teachers and school board members- make education decisions.
In the classic arcade game Centipede,players battle all but which of these deadly creatures?
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A boomer-WRONG!
In a day, kids in the U.S. that are between the ages of 2 - 8 spend 28 minutes of their time coloring
what is the only clothes that a house wheres
Measure twice, cut once.
Drink sake in Japan
Scuba Diving
The cross bow was invented by the Chinese and records of its usage goes back to as far as the Three Kingdom Period (220 a.d.-280 a.d.).
In the British royal family,which of the following is not the name of one of Prince Charles's three siblings?
I'm a lapsed Quaker. I don't go to meetings any more. But I'm very drawn to Catholicism - all that glitter. I'd love to be a Catholic. I think it would be fantastic - faith, forgiveness, absolution, extreme unction - all these wonderful words. I don't think anyone who was ever born a Catholic hasn't died a Catholic, no matter how lapsed they are.
How do you find Will Smith in the winter? You search for Fresh Prints.
i cool u down, i spin around quite fast.what am i?
One of the top five regrets people have is that they didn't have the courage to be their true self.
Eat a Cornish pasty in Cornwall
Safari
Serving ice cream on cherry pie was once illegal in Kansas
there is a man who lives on the 17th floor of this building. On rainy days he uses the elevator and on sunny days he takes the stairs. Why is this?
On December 21, 1864, General Sherman's famous "March to the Sea" concluded with the capture of what Southern city?
Want to hear a clean Joke? Johnny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty one? Bubbles is a man
I love learning new things that will never be put to practical use.
Try using an old idea.
Writing music
Spend a weekend at a Buddhist retreat
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times
On the classic TV series "Welcome Back Kotter" what subject did Mr. Kotter teach?
Love is the most important thing in the world. Hate, we should remove from the dictionary.
Want to hear a clean Joke? Johnny took a bath with bubbles. Want to hear a dirty one? Bubbles is a man
what is the 11 letter word that everyone spells incorrectly.
Attend Oktoberfest
Bus riding
Look people in the eye.
If you cannot unscrew the lid of a jar, try placing a rubber band around its circumference for extra grip.
Did you hear about what happened with the elk? It was really amoosing.
A man lives in a box house with a window at each wall, he looks out of every window and his compass always points south. Who's his wife ?
I don't really believe in diets. I love food... If I deprive myself, I'm going to want it more. I snack on yogurt, raw cashews and cherry tomatoes.
A 2008 study in "Reference Services Review" found which of these websites to be about 80% accurate?
Five thousandths of a millimeter is the tolerance of accuracy at the LEGO mould factories
Cheesemaking
Visit every Australian state
On the classic sitcom "Happy Days," what was the name of Richie's practical joke-loving buddy,played by actor Don Most?
Visit the Zhangye Danxia mountains
We're born with success. It is only others who point out our failures, and what they attribute to us as failure.
Why did the cookie go to the gym? To get in shape.
The Gastric Flu can cause projectile vomiting
IMS = R ROAD = A D T O W N = i i 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 =
Once in a while, eat some sweets you used to enjoy when you were younger.
Horseback riding
With production alone as the goal, industry in North America was dominated by the assembly line, standardization for mass consumption.
What is a tuna's favorite city? Albacoreque.
The deepest mine in the world is the East Rand mine, which goes to a depth of about 3,585 metres
When a door is not a door?
On the classic sitcom "I Love Lucy," Lucy often went on auditions using what maiden name instead of Mrs. Ricardo?
Computer programming
You don't need to floss all of your teeth. Only the ones you want to keep.
Make the pilgrimage to Jerusalem
Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a byte.
One out of 20 people have an extra rib
Perhaps there is no greater issue facing contemporary women than the choices they must make about balancing home and work.
A classic 1969 work by poet Maya Angelou is titled "I Know Why The Caged Bird" what?
You are running through a forrest and a lion is 5 seconds behind you. You know that there are 2 tribes in this forrest; one tribe always tells the truth; the other group always lies and they are all cannibals. You come to a fork in the road and one person from the two tribes is standing there. You have time to ask one question, what question would you ask?
Try to do the things that you're incapable of.
Celebrate Queen’s Day in the Netherlands
Biology
What do Egyptians do when their mass transit breaks down? Get Anubis.
Japan has approximately 200 volcanoes and is home to 10% of the active volcanoes in the world
I'm fascinated by failure, and I'm fascinated by finality. Shakespeare's historical plays are more universal than his comedies because they relate to the finality of life. Without finality, life would not be beautiful.
On March 4, 2010, baby Cecelia Marie Halpert was "born" on an emotional episode of what hit TV series?
If you think your headphones are dying, check the socket for fluff with a straightened paperclip.
Pet sitting
Attend a Royal Rumble
Why does a milking stool have only three legs? Because the cow has the udder!
In the classic version of Monopoly,the two "utility companies" are Water Works and the what?
The Ancient Greek women made a type of cheek blush by painting their cheeks with herbal pastes which was made out of crushed berries and seeds
For years I have been going to the South of France to cool out.
WHAT IS LIGHTER THAN A FEATHER BUT THE STRONGEST MAN CAN'T HOLD IT FOR LONG.
Take time once in a while to look up at the stars for at least 5 minutes, in order to comprehend your cosmic significance.
See one of my teams win a championship
Fishing
A 1952 episode of "I Love Lucy was titled "Lucy Is Enceinte" because what English word was censored?
The Kodiak, which is native to Alaska, is the largest bear and can measure up to eight feet and weigh as much as 1,700 pounds
What happens at night in Bangladesh? It gets Dhaka
When young, I am sweet in the sun. When middle-aged, I make you gay. When old, I am valued more than ever.
The monarchy is foremost a business, and it's important to them that the British public continue to finance the excessive luxurious lifestyles of the now quite enormous, wasteful and useless 'royal' family. I find it very sad.
Enjoy a little nonsense now and then.
Visit all 50 US states
Board/tabletop games
The first couple to be shown on a sitcom sleeping in the same bed was "Mary Kay and Johnny."
On HBO's "Entourage," movie star Vincent Chase stars in all but which of these fictional movies?
What is Paula Deen's favorite insect? The Butterfly
I don't think I could live without hair, makeup and styling, let alone be the performer I am. I am a glamour girl through and through. I believe in the glamorous life and I live one.
whats round to the touch, but when you take half away its worth twice as much
If you don't ask, you don't get.
Party on Ibiza
Climbing
A man applied for a job in an office. When he arrived at the busy, noisy office he was told by an attendant to fill out a form and then wait until he was called. He finished filling out the form and then waited with four other men who had arrived earlier. A few minutes later he was called to the inner office and was given the job. The other candidates were angry but the manager gave them a good reason why the man had been given the job. What was the reason? (bet your friends that they won't get the answer; because they won't)
God may be subtle, but he isn't plain mean.
Serving ice cream on cherry pie was once illegal in Kansas
A child starting kindergarten in September 2010 will ordinarily graduate from high school in what year?
What do you call... What do you call an Italian romance novel model who's let himself go? Flabio.
Always block trolls.
Digital arts
See Hallelujah Avatar Mountain
I went to the dermatologist about something on my neck- -and they said I just needed to scrub it!!!
Pitcher Darold Knowles once pitched all seven games of one World Series
On average, what denomination of U.S. paper currency remains in circulation the longest?
As an actor, you just want to work, and then you just want to be on a show or have a job that you love, and you hope that job will last - those things have happened. To have that platform to then talk about something that is very personal to me like marriage equality, it feels like a gift. I try and really respect that voice and not abuse it.
Share positive energy.
Collecting
Foster a child in need
I tolerate the moon and stars I can’t abide the sun banish me with torchlight and you will see me turn and run.
The player had the puck and there was an empty net, why didnt he score?
With a name like Freddy Mercury... shouldn't he have done heavy metal?
The Gastric Flu can cause projectile vomiting
Just as the soul fills the body, so God fills the world. Just as the soul bears the body, so God endures the world. Just as the soul sees but is not seen, so God sees but is not seen. Just as the soul feeds the body, so God gives food to the world.
It's unlucky to be superstitious.
A classic 1969 work by poet Maya Angelou is titled "I Know Why The Caged Bird" what?
Breadmaking
Cage dive with great white sharks
What gun do you use to hunt a moose? A moosecut!
The Ancient Greek women made a type of cheek blush by painting their cheeks with herbal pastes which was made out of crushed berries and seeds
In the classic folk song "On Top of Old Smoky," what is "Old Smoky"?
They gave each other a smile with a future in it.
The Legend Writ And Stain Affected The key In Silence Undetected 55 In Iron Pen Mr. Mattlock Can't Offend.
Drink a glass of water before meals.
See Big Ben
Journaling
The two factories of the Jelly Belly Candy Company produces approximately 100,000 pounds of jelly beans a day. this amounts to about 1,250,000 jelly beans an hour
Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn't stop to enjoy it.
Which is faster, hot or cold? Hot is faster. Anyone can catch a cold.
if 2p in change would be 1p so what would be 10p?
BMX
Stand at Australia’s northernmost point
Age is of no importance, unless you are a cheese.
A 2010 study found that nearly 70% of what imported item failed to live up to its claims of being "extra virgin"?
A 2011 box set celebrates the 13-film collaboration between composer Danny Elfman and what film director?
The word "comet" comes from the Greek word "kometes" meaning long hair and referring to the tail
Men will never establish any equality with which they can be contented. Whatever efforts a people may make, they will never succeed in reducing all the conditions of society to a perfect level.
Why did the marine vote for the dragoon? He was Protoss
What goes up and never comes down?
Remedy tickly coughs with a drink of honey, lemon and water as hot as you can take.
Astrology
Chop my own firewood