one day a nanny was looking for a job and saw one in a newspaper so she found an adress and talked to the lady and soon the kids come out and they fun up to her and what did they say
As more people rely on government programs, the harder it becomes to conduct the necessary reforms to preserve them to help our society's most vulnerable.
If an airplane crashed on the border of Canada and USA, where would the survivors be buried?
Being told about the effects of climate change is an appeal to our reason and to our desire to bring about change. But to see that Africans are the hardest hit by climate change, even though they generate almost no greenhouse gas, is a glaring injustice, which also triggers anger and outrage over those who seek to ignore it.
the person who invented it did not want it. the person who wanted it did not need it and the person who needed it did not know about it.
How did the firefly feel when he flew into the fan? He was de-lighted
On clear days I search in silence, my cool eye a shade of pale; In billowing thickness with glaring red eye, I screech and wail. My power keeps you from the glow. Ever-ready, you'll know to go. Effete, you'll probably be too slow.
For me, I am left leaning when it comes to health and education, on the right when it comes to defense. So I don't know where I come on the political spectrum. And I think this the challenge that a lot of Jordanians have to deal with.
What goes on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and three in the evening.
First original joke! Why did the rapper visit the urologist? Because his flows were so sick.
Civil union is less than marriage. Marriage is a sacred and valued institution and ought to be afforded equal protection.
dogs and cats fallingg every where. how do they make them stop falling??????????
Well, a sort of epiphany: I was in a great band. And it's very cool to be at 53 and realise that when you were a kid you were in a great band.
There are 2 kids, Chloe and Nathan and they are twins. The thing is that they are born 3 days apart. How is this possible?
Hitchhiking was such a pure form of existence. You'd wake up in the morning, and you'd have no idea what your day was going to be. And that's something I've never been able to shake. I loved that.
When we shoot 24, there are so many things I have to worry about, from the script to technical things to my performance, that I don't have a second to be bored or take anything for granted. We produce 24 hours of film a season, which is like making 12 movies.
When you become a mom you just learn how to function sleep deprived and you do get used to it. I came back to work when Finley was three months old and the first few months were rough. Then somehow you learn to exist on no sleep and now when he does upon occasion sleep through the night, which is like a full six hours, you're pretty sure he's suffocating. So you don't sleep anyway.
If you have it, You want to share it. If you share it, You don't have it.
I have no legs or arms but I still eat with a fork everyday, What am I?
Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend. Non-being is the greatest joy.
Doctor says to lawyer We were born on the same year, month, day, and minute. We were born in the same hospital, hospital room and we have the same 2 parents. We are not twins and we have no brothers. Explain this.
Yale places great stress on undergraduate and graduate teaching. I like teaching, and I do a lot of it.
why do you go to bed?
If April showers bring May flowers then what do May flowers bring?
When I am finishing a picture, I hold some God-made object up to it - a rock, a flower, the branch of a tree or my hand - as a final test. If the painting stands up beside a thing man cannot make, the painting is authentic. If there's a clash between the two, it's bad art.
I am two-faced but bear only one, I have no legs but travel widely. Men spill much blood over me, kings leave there imprint on me. I have greatest power when given away, yet lust for me keeps me locked away. What am I?
My first is in horse but not in pony My second is in coyote but not in jackal My third is in shrew and also in vole My fourth is in panda but not in bear My last is in baboon but not in monkey
Exuberance is beauty.
amanda bought a brand new car that was freshly painted red. after paying $500.00 on a paint job it rained and she cried. why?
Right actions in the future are the best apologies for bad actions in the past.
I tried dolphin once...but not on porpoise.
We were really grown up for our age and it was an incredible special band.
What is marriage, is marriage protection or religion, is marriage renunciation or abundance, is marriage a stepping-stone or an end. What is marriage.
The best music is essentially there to provide you something to face the world with.
A man is kidnapped because the kidnappers heard that he is very intelegent. They want him to make a statement that is neither true nor false. If the question is true they will shoot him with a shot gun. If it is false, they will boil him in oil. In the end, they let him go. What did the man say?
Health food makes me sick.
I stand Fifty romans Nothing comes Five romans Then comes the reverse of three Then you comes last.
The whole world loves American movies, blue jeans, jazz and rock and roll. It is probably a better way to get to know our country than by what politicians or airline commercials represent.
There is a higher law than the law of government. That's the law of conscience.
A team won one to zero but not one man crssed homeplate. How is this possible.
My dad always used to tell me that if they challenge you to an after-school fight, tell them you won't wait-you can kick their ass right now.
i have a head, i have a tail.People use me often because im cute. Im very stiff. I dont have organs.What am i ????
Only people who have been allowed to practise freedom can have the grown-up look in their eyes.
What is greater than God, More evil than the devil, The poor have it, The rich need it, And if you eat it you die?
What do you call it when someone resuscitates a person who chokes on alcohol? La chaim-lich maneuver.
Independence is happiness.
What's so fragile that even when you say its name, you break it?
I think that if you keep your eyes and your ears open and you are receptive to learning, there are skills you can get from any job at all.
Imagine if you had baseball cards that showed all the performance stats for your people: batting averages, home runs, errors, ERAs, win/loss records. You could see what they did well and poorly and call on the right people to play the right positions in a very transparent way.
Adored by few, Feared and hated by many. Mistress of the entire universal reason, Master in the art of numbers. Some may have solved many of your mysteries, But there still much of them to find. What are they?
A car for every purse and purpose.
There's really no point in having children if you're not going to be home enough to father them.
No man should marry until he has studied anatomy and dissected at least one woman.
What does a beggar have, That a rich man needs, And that dead man eat?
A boy was born in 1965 and he is just turning 18 years old. How is that possible?
Why couldn't Elsa hold on to a balloon? She would always let it go.
Let a man do what he will by a single woman, the world is encouragingly apt to think Marriage a sufficient amends.
There was a moment in my life when I really wanted to kill myself. And there was one other moment when I was close to that. But even in my most jaded times, I had some hope.
A boy was at a carnival and went to a booth where a man said to the boy, "If I write your exact weight on this piece of paper then you have to give me $50, but if I cannot, I will pay you $50." The boy looked around and saw no scale so he agrees, thinking no matter what the carny writes he'll just say he weighs more or less. In the end the boy ended up paying the man $50. The question is: How did the man win the bet?
There are times when fear is good. It must keep its watchful place at the heart's controls.
There were two twins. 1 of them were 20 and the other was 22 how does this work?
There is no true love save in suffering, and in this world we have to choose either love, which is suffering, or happiness. Man is the more man - that is, the more divine - the greater his capacity for suffering, or rather, for anguish.
I think a lot of food shows, especially when we started 'Good Eats' back in the late '90s, they were still really about food. 'Good Eats' isn't about food, it's about entertainment. If, however, we can virally infect you with knowledge or interest, then all the better.
What did teeth give their teeth friends when they were sad?
Be the business never so painful, you may have it done for money.
I am the hardest thing to create and maintane but I am very easily broken what am I?
We're going to be able to ask our computers to monitor things for us, and when certain conditions happen, are triggered, the computers will take certain actions and inform us after the fact.
I want a nose.
We are sinful not merely because we have eaten of the tree of knowledge, but also because we have not eaten of the tree of life.
I don't drive around London much. Any journey around Islington involves hundreds of speed bumps that seem to tear the bottom of your car off.
I have billions of eyes, noses, and mouths, yet I reside in complete darkness. I have billions of ears, yet I possess only a quartet of lobes. I possess absolutely no musculature, yet I have control a pair of hemisphers with an iron fist. What am I??
Well, the first thing is that truth and power for me form an antithesis, an antagonism, which will hardly ever be resolved. I can define in fact, can simplify the history of human society, the evolution of human society, as a contest between power and freedom.
Let us tenderly and kindly cherish, therefore, the means of knowledge. Let us dare to read, think, speak, and write.
Loudly I flicker, with a crackle and pop. Feed me now quicker, or I will just stop.What am I?
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
A guy came to the shop every day. A lot of guys put the foam like stuff that forms to you, kinda like the Indy car guys run. He fitted it up and it felt real good, so we're going to try to run it.