I have two heads but only one body. The stiller I stand the faster I run.
A caprese salad traditionally includes which of these ingredients?
Education is not a problem. Education is an opportunity.
Elizabeth Taylor has appeared on the cover of Life magazine more than anyone else
How do you kill a circus? You stab it in the juggler.
See a chart topping band in concert
Today, do not use the words "Kind of", "Sort of" or "Maybe". It either is or it isn't.
Speed skating
The typical lead pencil can draw a line that is thirty five miles long
A classic 1969 work by poet Maya Angelou is titled "I Know Why The Caged Bird" what?
My dream is of a place and a time where America will once again be seen as the last best hope of earth.
Captain Ahab's crew were highly efficient sailors In fact, they were running like a whale oiled machine.
You are sitting in a white room that has no windows or doors. All that's in the room is a table and a mirror. How do you escape?
Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
Lego building
Attend the Calgary Stampede
on my way to st.ives i met a man with 7 wives each wive had 7 cats each cat had 7 kittens. kittens cats and wives how many were going to st. ives
What happens when you steamroll Batman and Robin? They become flatman and ribbon.
My view is that good community management is like having good municipal government: You should be able to have dissenting opinions and so on, freedom of speech, but your grandmother should also be able to walk down the street at night without having to worry about getting mugged.
On the Fahrenheit scale, 98.6 degrees is generally considered to be what?
Shear a sheep
Gratitude is said to be the secret to happiness.
Do it yourself
Macadamia nuts are not sold in their shells because it takes 300 pounds per square inch of pressure to break the shell
In the Bizet opera, "Carmen," the flirtatious Carmen works in what type of establishment?
Japan has approximately 200 volcanoes and is home to 10% of the active volcanoes in the world
I'm not saying that there's anything better than mated bliss at its best, but I'm saying that living alone is as good in its own way. But we haven't quite given ourselves permission to recognize that.
Knock! Knock! Knock! Knock! Whos there? Control Freak. Con Okay, now you say, Control Freak who?
It can be made many different ways. Wars have been started over it. Almost every country has had this at one point, and you probably have too. It can be as hotter than 100 degrees and colder than ice. It is still used, no matter what temperature it is. What is it?
Twins
When something goes wrong in life, just shout "plot twist!" and carry on.
Video making
why did 1yr old tommy cry after being fed?
There is hope in dreams, imagination, and in the courage of those who wish to make those dreams a reality.
One out of 20 people have an extra rib
Why Does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? For drizzle, my nizzle.
Rapping
Visit Stull, Kansas
In the agency abbreviation "EEOC," the first E stands for "equal" and the second stands for what?
Don't eat anything your grandparents wouldn't recognise as food.
A 2011 box set celebrates the 13-film collaboration between composer Danny Elfman and what film director?
The deepest mine in the world is the East Rand mine, which goes to a depth of about 3,585 metres
Why should you never invite a boxer to a party? He always throws the punch.
I heard so many stories from Gaomi's peasants that I had an irrepressible urge to write them down. Today, Gaomi's peasants know that they have become famous around the world through my writings, but I think they are a little puzzled by this.
A man celebrated his 21st birthday in 2006 and He also announced that he was born in 1781. How is this POSSIBLE?
Sing in the shower.
Visit Madagascar
Djembe
I had a conversation with a Mobius strip... It was one-sided.
I am the beginning of earth and eternity,I am the end of time and space,I am the end of the universe. what am I?
On the classic TV series "The Brady Bunch,"what is the name of the Brady family dog?
Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to become the best of which you are capable.
A meteor has only destroyed one satellite, which was the European Space Agency's Olympus in 1993.
Plant a tree.
Start my own magazine
VR Gaming
What did the bee use to get out the tangles? A honeycomb.
The two factories of the Jelly Belly Candy Company produces approximately 100,000 pounds of jelly beans a day. this amounts to about 1,250,000 jelly beans an hour
People are patronizing the theatres with renewed enthusiasm - there is an entire picnic-like attitude when families go out to see movies, which is a very good sign. They want to see larger-than-life characters on the big screen and not just watch movies on television or on DVDs.
On the classic sitcom "Happy Days," what was the name of Richie's practical joke-loving buddy,played by actor Don Most?
To improve productivity, always have a shittier task to put off.
Have my writing published in hard form
Poi
cannot be seen;cannot be felt cannot be heard;cannot be smelt it lies behind stars and under hills empty holes it fills it comes first and follow after ends life kills laughter. what can it be?
Orcas (killer whales), when traveling in groups, breathe in unison
More retailers should adopt the "Leave A Penny / Take A Penny" system. It is literally, common cents.
In the British royal family,which of the following is not the name of one of Prince Charles's three siblings?
My dad is a bank president and my mom was an accountant and they didn't think that seeking the life of a freelance writer was very practical, you see. Of course, I was just as determined to do it.
You are stuck in a house with no possible way out.No doors no windows and u are left with a mirror and a table how do u get out?
If you're feeling tired or anxious, a pint of water will almost always make you feel better.
See my reflection upon Salar de Uyuni
Minimalism
What's green and fuzzy and can kill you if it falls from a tree? A pool table.
The abbreviation Xmas for the word Christmas is of Greek origin. Since the word for Christ in the Greek language is Xristos, which starts with the letter "X," they started putting the X in place of Christ and came up with the short form for the word Christmas
A blacksmith works primarily with what metal?
Human knowledge is dark and uncertain philosophy is dark, astrology is dark, and geometry is dark.
What is a word that is unexpected and has metal in the front?
Enjoy a little nonsense now and then.
Bullet journaling
Ride all 17 coasters at Cedar Point
In 1810, Peter Durand invented the tin can for preserving food
What is Forrest Gump's favorite pasta? Penne
In the children's rhyme "This Little Piggy," where did the first little piggy go?
A good thing to remember is somebody's got it a lot worse than we do.
Look people in the eye.
Harvest my own fruit and bake something with it
Dog training
The blue house was located on elm street.The red house was located on 31st street.Where is the white house located?
See a ghost
What kind of dish does LeBron like? anything with curry in it.
On television, Dr. Gregory House's apartment number is "221B," a nod to what famous literary sleuth's address?
The Tonle Sap River in Cambodia flows north for almost half the year and then south for the rest of the year
So if I design it and then go away, it's still living somewhere and it still exists by itself without me.
Remedy tickly coughs with a drink of honey, lemon and water as hot as you can take.
Knot tying
IMS = R ROAD = A D T O W N = i i 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 =
Colour is not an indicator for the taste or ripeness in cranberries
What's an oven's favorite comedy routine? Deadpan.
Everybody has a gun in their car in Detroit.
On an '80s TV series, a plucky orphan named Penelope Brewster was better known as what?
Tell it like it is.
I'm thin but wide. Long and easily ripped. I'm used to draw. I lay around until i'm used. I'm in a book but not only new.
Attend the Full Moon Party in Thailand
Flower arranging
Mars is the home of Olympus Mons, the largest known volcano in our solar system
I was walking in the desert and saw a redwood tree. I knew this must be a mirage, so I ran into it. To my dismay, the tree and I collided. I guess it must have been an obstacle illusion.
No man is the wiser for his learning it may administer matter to work in, or objects to work upon but wit and wisdom are born with a man.
On his show "Man v Food," host Adam Richman won the "Davy Jones Locker Challenge" by eating 7 pounds of what?
You never really grow up.
Bullet journaling
See Niagara Falls
a man is dead, lying in the middle of the desert wearing a backpack, no winds have been reported in the area to cover up any tracks. How did he die?
Macadamia nuts are not sold in their shells because it takes 300 pounds per square inch of pressure to break the shell
God, as Truth, has been for me a treasure beyond price. May He be so to every one of us.
In the classic animated movie "The Little Mermaid," Ariel's best friend is a fish named what?
there is a naked guy dead lying in the desert. two miles to the right from is body are his cothes two miles to the left of his body is a cliff. in his hand is a piece of straw. how did he die?
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it felt crumbly.
Hike in the Daintree Rainforest
If you have grandparents or parents - Talk to them more. Ask them about their life experiences.
Entrepreneurship
What kind of bees make milk? Boobies.
Percentage of American men who say they would marry the same woman if they had it to do all over again: 80%
On the classic TV series "The Brady Bunch,"what is the name of the Brady family dog?
When we are unwilling to draw clear moral lines between free societies and fear societies, when we are unwilling to call the former good and the latter evil, we will not be able to advance the cause of peace because peace cannot be disconnected from freedom.
A kind man comes across a dirty box, a voice says to him "Coconuts, $5 a dozen" With his lightning quick arithmetic he calculates that if he sold those same coconuts to the coconut air assault team for the accepted rate of $3 per dozen that in no time at all he would be a millionaire. What's with this guy, assuming his math is accurate?
You can have too much of a good thing.
Visit the Sertar Buddhist Academy
Word searches
Do not check work email on your days off.
Throughout the South, peanuts were known as "Monkey Nuts," and "Goober peas," before the civil war
I suppose when they reach a certain age some men are afraid to grow up. It seems the older the men get, the younger their new wives get.
What Time Do You Go To The Dentist? Tooth - Hurty!
what is so light that it could even float on water but no mans could carry it?
A 1960s TV character played by Al Lewis, Count Vladimir Dracula is better known by what name?
Exhibition drill
Learn to do a standing flip or kip-up
Why did Beethoven kill off his chickens? They kept saying, "Bach, Bach, Bach."
A chicken with red earlobes will produce brown eggs, and a chicken with white earlobes will produce white eggs
All women have a perception much more developed than men. So all women somehow, being repressed for so many millennia, they ended up by developing this sixth sense and contemplation and love. And this is something that we have a hard time to accept as part of our society.
A 1952 episode of "I Love Lucy was titled "Lucy Is Enceinte" because what English word was censored?
There is a bomber plane flying through the air. Nothing is wrong with this plane, everything works in perfection. The bomb hatches open and the clamps that hold the bomb open to release but the bomb goes nowhere. Why?
Get paid to act
The sun always shines above the clouds.
Slacklining
I named my cat "Curiosity". He killed himself ... Nine times.
In 1967, the IMAX film system was invented by Canadian Ivan Grame Ferguson to premier at Expo 67.
In the cable drama "Boss," Kelsey Grammar plays a crooked mayor of what U.S. city?
All men are by nature equal, made all of the same earth by one Workman and however we deceive ourselves, as dear unto God is the poor peasant as the mighty prince.
what is black white and red all over?
A common regret in life is wishing one had the courage to be ones true self.
Attend the Edinburgh Tattoo
Bus spotting
A 1985 North Atlantic expedition led by Robert Ballard discovered the wreck of what famous ship 73 years after it sank?
Humans are born with 300 bones in their body, however when a person reaches adulthood they only have 206 bones. This occurs because many of them join together to make a single bone
Here in America we are descended in blood and in spirit from revolutionists and rebels - men and women who dare to dissent from accepted doctrine. As their heirs, may we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion.
If you were running a race, and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?
What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence? Utter destruction!
If it still itches after a week, go to the doctors.
Fossil hunting
Witness the Great Migration
On the one hand, I've had such a normal upbringing with my mum, who has kept me grounded, but on the other, the wild experiences through my dad.
What's invisible and smells like carrots? Bunny farts.
On the human body, the area of skin known as "The T-zone" is located where?
The reason why hair turns gray as we age is because the pigment cells in the hair follicle start to die, which is responsible for producing "melanin" which gives the hair colour
A bus driver was heading down a street in Colorado. He went right past a stop sign without stopping, he turned left where there was a "no left turn" sign, and he went the wrong way on a one-way street. Then he went on the left side of the road past a cop car. Still - he didn't break any traffic laws. Why not?
If you don't want something to be public, don't post it on the Internet.
Rappelling
Receive a love letter
Of married couples, 70% of men and 60% of women have cheated on their spouse
I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely... if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone.
As far as I was concerned, either I was a homosexual or I wasn't, so making films would change nothing.
what is once in a minute twice in a moment but not once in a hour?
Plant a tree.
Inventing
In the classic folk song "On Top of Old Smoky," what is "Old Smoky"?
Kiss somebody under mistletoe
Don't eat non-snow-coloured snow.
Superman The Escape rollercoaster, located in California at Six Flags Magic Mountain, goes from 0 to 100 miles per hour in only 7 seconds
Every morning I run around the block 5 times... ...Then I slide the block back under the bed and go back to sleep
Opera, next to Gothic architecture, is one of the strangest inventions of Western man. It could not have been foreseen by any logical process.
In the climactic prom scene of the 1976 film "Carrie," the title character is doused with the blood of what farm animal?
I have no feet to dance, I have no eyes to see, I hav eno life to live or die but yet I do all three. What am I?
Wikipedia editing
See the Big 5 in the wild
On average, what denomination of U.S. paper currency remains in circulation the longest?
What happened to the runny nose... it tripped and fell. Now it's all boogered up.
The deepest mine in the world is the East Rand mine, which goes to a depth of about 3,585 metres
{ People walk on me day and night. I never sleep...... Who am I?
Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.
When you look around and don't see anyone you respect, its time to leave.
Learn how to pick pockets
Quidditch
What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? Shear madness.
NASCAR stands for National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing
A bushel is a standard unit originally used to measure the weight of what?
MY NEIGHBOR MAKES MISTAKES I GET RID OF THEM
The course of true love never did run smooth.
Never run a marathon in Crocs.
Attend a Renaissance Festival
Composting
Why did the jellyroll? He saw the apple turnover.
Today, more than ever before, life must be characterized by a sense of Universal responsibility, not only nation to nation and human to human, but also human to other forms of life.
Whats once in time ,twice in a moment ,but never in a thousand years?
It is estimated that by the end of 2000, there has been 142,600 tonnes of gold mined in the world
A common regret in life is wishing one hadn't worked so hard.
Swim in the Hamilton Pool
Gunsmithing
In the classic tearjerker "Beaches," two girls begin their lifelong friendship on a beach in what U.S. state?
The expression cooked "al dente" means "to the tooth." What this means is that the pasta should be somewhat firm, and offer some resistance to the tooth, but should also be tender
In the classic Rocky and Bullwinkle cartoons,Rocky is what type of animal?
Change is not a destination, just as hope is not a strategy.
Mary's father has five children. They are Nana, Nene, Nini, and Nono. What is the fifth childs name?
What did daddy fish do when mommy fish got herself lost? ...He flounder
Turn jeans inside out when washing them to help preserve their colour.
Try skeet shooting
Vacation
Pucks hit by hockey sticks have reached speeds of up to 150 miles per hour
Why can't a Pirate make it through their ABC's? They always get lost at C.
I have no requirements for a style of architecture.
what do you call something green that pecks on trees?
Being kind is more rewarding than being right.
Public transport riding
Attend a West Ham game
On his past troubles,who admitted to Leno on a 2011 "Tonight Show" appearance, "I realized I was pretty much LOSING"?
The higher up you are in a company, the more likely it is that your boss is a psychopath.
The Planters Peanut Company mascot, Mr. Peanut, was created during a contest for schoolchildren in 1916
The computer can't tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what's missing is the eyebrows.
How can you give someone $63 using six bills, without using any one dollar bills?
Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing.
Handball
In the classic story "Peter Pan," what does Wendy use to reattach Peter's shadow?
Ride a train in India
The reason why hair turns gray as we age is because the pigment cells in the hair follicle start to die, which is responsible for producing "melanin" which gives the hair colour
If you know it, you have it. If you dont know it, you dont have it.
I hate those e-books. They can not be the future... they may well be... I will be dead.
What do you call fake German currency? Question marks
On television, Dr. Gregory House's apartment number is "221B," a nod to what famous literary sleuth's address?
Put a piece of kitchen roll in with your bag of leaves to make them last longer.
Be complimented on my body
Kite flying
For more than 3,000 years, Carpenter ants have been used to close wounds in India, Asia and South America
I found it an interesting portrait of a marriage in exploring notions of how one partner supports the other, whilst not jeopardizing the greater good - which is the family.
What kind of beer does a cow brew? Heifer-weizen.
In the classic arcade game Centipede,players battle all but which of these deadly creatures?
You are stuck in a room with no doors, no windows, and a roof. The only things you have are a table and a saw. How do you get out, without cutting through the walls/roof?
Don't wear clean trousers when walking your dog in the park.
LARPing
Boat down the Nile
You are in a steel room there are no windows and no doors. The only things in the room is: you, a saw, and a wooden table. How do you escape???
Why did the lettuce get arrested? ...for disturbing the peas!
The token gay character is always so funny and so fantastic. That's happened a lot. Or they're often purely victims.
The abbreviation Xmas for the word Christmas is of Greek origin. Since the word for Christ in the Greek language is Xristos, which starts with the letter "X," they started putting the X in place of Christ and came up with the short form for the word Christmas
In the AAMCO song, when does the double beep occur.
If you need cheering up, try searching online for photos of kittens.
Climb up to Tiger’s Nest
Foreign language learning
In the AAMCO song, when does the double beep occur.
Superman The Escape rollercoaster, located in California at Six Flags Magic Mountain, goes from 0 to 100 miles per hour in only 7 seconds
Why were the treefrog's stories always so attention grabbing? Because he was absolutely ribbeting!
The hardest people to reach with the love of God are not the bad people. They know they are bad. They have no defense. The hardest ones to win for God are the self-righteous people.
A SIP IS OVER FLOWING WITH PEOPLE AND ANIMALS IF ANYTHING ELSE GOES ON THE SHIP THE SHIP WILL SINK AND THEN A COW HAS A POO. DOES THE SHIP SINK OR STAY FLOATING?
Don't eat anything your grandparents wouldn't recognise as food.
Explore the Florida Everglades
Botany
What the the electrician say to his buddy? Watts up?!
No piece of paper can be folded in half more than 7 times
In the children's book "The Little Engine That Could",what is the engine attempting to deliver?
At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he know he can't.
What herb cures all illnesses?
If you've nothing nice to say, say nothing.
Exhibition drill
Celebrate Songkran in Thailand
You never really grow up.
The Planters Peanut Company mascot, Mr. Peanut, was created during a contest for schoolchildren in 1916
What's green and fuzzy and can kill you if it falls from a tree? A pool table.
I'm still that little girl who lisped and sat in the back of the car and threw vegetables at the back of her head when we drove home from the market. That never goes.
A 2010 study found that nearly 70% of what imported item failed to live up to its claims of being "extra virgin"?
Rungs of a Ladder The rungs of a 10 foot ladder attached to a ship are 1 foot apart. If the water is rising at the rate of one foot an hour, how long will it take until the water covers over the ladder?...
Railway studies
Take a couple photo in the Tunnel of Love
My brother likes driving black and white F1 race cars. They call him the F1 racist.
The only time I commit to conspiracy theories is when something way retarded happens. Like Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone.
A clarsach-a traditional Irish musical instrument-is a kind of what?
what has four eyes and no legs and tail?
Five thousandths of a millimeter is the tolerance of accuracy at the LEGO mould factories
It's unlucky to be superstitious.
Visit Dubai
Homebrewing
what did socrates learn from the T-rex? i dino
There is a magnet in your heart that will attract true friends. That magnet is unselfishness, thinking of others first when you learn to live for others, they will live for you.
what has a mouth but never talks what has a bed but never sleeps and what has a sauce but never eats?
Big things have small beginnings.
Stand-up comedy
To avoid being mistaken for a sellout, I chose my friends carefully. The more politically active black students. The foreign students. The Chicanos. The Marxist professors and structural feminists and punk-rock performance poets.
What kind of bird can write? A penguin.
whos cool
Explore the Batu Caves
Physics
you are in a cave there's three doors in front of you.in the first door there are lions that haven't eating for a hundred years.in the second one there are venomous snakes.in the third one there are killer womans. all of them leads to the exit.wich one do u chose?
What's the difference between a cat and a complex sentence? A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.
It is no longer an unwritten law of American capitalism that industry will attempt to maintain wages at a level that allows a single wage to support a family.
Miniature art
What starts with "P", ends with "E", and has many letters?
What Paris has done right is to make it awful to get around by car and awfully easy to get around by public transportation or by bike.
This Post just says it all! It all.
Spend the night in an underwater hotel
If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face - forever.
If all of Ireland sank, what part of it wouldn't? County Cork
See the rice terraces of Mu Cang Chai
d[sd'[sd]
We have to struggle against the conservatives from all sides, not only the right-wingers, but also the left-wing conservatives who don't want to change anything.
Why is Dr. Frankenstein never lonely? He's good at making friends.
A man dies of thirst in his own home. How is this possible?
Mankind is made great or little by its own will.
FOUR is HALF of FIVE. Is this statement True or False?
My dad, like many Southern men, is this very emotionally expressive person who isn't as articulate in words about his feelings as he is with breaking a chair or something like that.
U ARE THE BUS DRIVER. AT THE FIRST STOP YOU PICK UP 738 PEOPLE, AT THE 2ND U DROP OF 243 THEN AT THE THIRD YOU PICK UP 472 AND DROP OFF 684. AT THE 4TH STOP YOU TAKE THE NUMBER U HAVE DIVIDE IT BY 73 AND THATS HOW MANY PEOPLE GOT ON. AT THE LAST STOP U PICK UP 358 AND DROP OFF THE REST. WHAT COLOR ARE THE BUS DRIVERS EYES?
I read less and less. I have not forgiven books for their failure to tell me the truth and make me happy.
Why did the Russians use peanuts for torture in the Cold War? Because in Soviet Russia, Nut Cracks You!
a woman snaps at her husband. she holds him underwater for five minutes. then hangs him nfor five minutes. a half an hour later the couple go out to dinner. how is this possible?
Attend the Super Bowl
Friendship is held to be the severest test of character. It is easy, we think, to be loyal to a family and clan, whose blood is in your own veins.
Bathe an elephant at the Elephant Nature Park
What am i thinking about right now.
The future which we hold in trust for our own children will be shaped by our fairness to other people's children.
Suppose you want to send in the mail a valuable object to a friend. You have a box which is big enough to hold the object. The box has a locking ring which is large enough to have a lock attached and you have several locks with keys. However, your friend does not have the key to any lock that you have. You cannot send the key in an unlocked box since it may be stolen or copied. How do you send the valuable object, locked, to your friend - so it may be opened by your friend?