What letter is most like an island?
When I was a kid and got in trouble, I'd always say, Mom, I'm in trouble. Well, Mom, I'm in trouble.
The love of family and the admiration of friends is much more important than wealth and privilege.
the dryer it is the wetter it gets the wetter it is the heavier waht am i
Courage is never to let your actions be influenced by your fears.
a man road up the hill on tuesday,stayed there for 3 nights and rode down again on tuesday. how does this work?
How many legs does a mule have if you call its tail a leg?
Government is an association of men who do violence to the rest of us.
Happiness, that grand mistress of the ceremonies in the dance of life, impels us through all its mazes and meanderings, but leads none of us by the same route.
There are two guys and one is wearing a hat. The one guy asks the guy with the hat to take it off. So he does but, he dosn't reveal any hair. What happened????
Washington has got to, across the board, lower taxes for small businesses so that our mom and pops can reinvest and hire people, so that our businesses can thrive.
Hii
You can crack me, tell me and ask me.What am I?
I've yet to be on a campus where most women weren't worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I've yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing.
Music is my home.
Why is Ireland the richest country in the world? Because it's capital is always Dublin.
I have a father and mother, yet I am not their son. Who am I??
I change my opinions often, but not my way of thinking.
H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O.
What does man love more than life, fear more than death ar mortal strife, What the poor have the rich require and what contented men desire, what misers spend and spendthrifs save and all men carry to the grave.
Violence is a part of America. I don't want to single out rap music. Let's be honest. America's the most violent country in the history of the world, that's just the way it is. We're all affected by it.
Armadillo The world needs more armed dillos.
But I think it is a serious issue to wonder about the other platonic absolutes of say beauty and morality.
If you have it, you want to share it. If you share it, you don't have it.
Before Mt. Everest was discovered, what was the tallest mountain in the world?
The irony is that you can't use real rain to make movies.
Why did the knife quit? It couldn't CUT IT!
The world of knowledge takes a crazy turn when teachers themselves are taught to learn.
I'm the part of the bird that's not in the sky. I can swim in the ocean and yet remain dry. What am I?
Few nations have been so poor as to have but one god. Gods were made so easily, and the raw material cost so little, that generally the god market was fairly glutted and heaven crammed with these phantoms.
There was a man who kept on commiting crimes. He is taken into to court for the third time. The Judge says we have traced back the comments you made in previous courts and we have found out you have bben lying. Your sentance will be to be hung by the neck until dead... However if you can write down a true statement on a pice of paper on the day of your execution then your sentace will only be 10 years injailed. so it came to the day when the man was going to be hung and he wrote down a statement. The Judge read the statemant and realeased the suspect with no charge. What did he write on the paper (Read through a few times and you might understad more)
I am the ruler of shovels, I have a double. I am as thin as a knife, I have a wife. What am I?
Where you are in consciousness has everything to do with what you see in experience.
I can't wait for my little sisters to start dating, because it will really be fun to pick on their boyfriends.
On Christmas Eve Santa comes to Bring the presents to The good Boys and Girls..... But Which way Does he Come in?
All my day is spent dealing with other people. When I come home I like it to be empty. The presence of others in my house kind of annoys me. I love coming home and shutting the doors. I feel brain dead. I'm relatively available, but not to live with.
You have been captured by pirates. They will only let you go if you do a task for them. If you fail then you will be killed. They show you a partially empty barrel of rum, and you have to tell them if it is more or less than half full. You have no tools, and you cannot let a drop of rum leave the barrel. How can you do it, and avoid walking the plank?
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired.
I think the first step is to understand that forgiveness does not exonerate the perpetrator. Forgiveness liberates the victim. It's a gift you give yourself.
He that can live alone resembles the brute beast in nothing, the sage in much, and God in everything.
In the first book of my Discworld series, published more than 26 years ago, I introduced Death as a character there was nothing particularly new about this - death has featured in art and literature since medieval times, and for centuries we have had a fascination with the Grim Reaper.
I can spell yet i have no mouth i can speak to animals but cant speak to humans i am feirce but small What am I ?
Although we have, in theory, abolished human slavery, recognized women's rights, and stopped child labor, we continue to enslave other species who, if we simply pay attention, show quite clearly that they experience parental love, pain, and the desire for freedom, just as we do.
i turn polar bears white and i will make you cry. i make guys have to pee and girls comb their hair. i make celebrities look stupid and normal ppl look like celebrities. i turn pancakes brown and make ur champagne bubble. if u squeeze me, i'll pop. if u look at me, u'll pop.
Basically, I believe the world is a jungle, and if it's not a bit of a jungle in the home, a child cannot possibly be fit to enter the outside world.
If there's anything more mortifying than being famous at 14, it's being washed up right after.
The boy is a boy and the girl is a girl but the girl has no idea that she is a girl and the boy has no idea that he is a girl. The boy has long hair and the girl has short hair and the girl takes her top off in front of everyone while the boy thinks that rude and disgusting. Who's who.
It's art that pushes against psychological and social expectations, that tries to transform decay into something generative, that is replicative in a baroque way, that isn't about progress, and wants to - as Walt Whitman put it - 'contain multitudes.'
Jews read the books of Moses not just as history but as divine command. The question to which they are an answer is not, 'What happened?' but rather, 'How then shall I live?' And it's only with the exodus that the life of the commands really begins.
WHAT IS MY NAME
I was really into classifieds for awhile. I'm a big negotiator. My father owned a car dealership when I was younger... it's just in my blood.
What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.
The vain beauty cares most for the conquest which employed the whole artillery of her charms.
I'm named after nothing, though I'm awfully clamorous. And when I'm not working, your house is less glamorous. What am I?
Programmers tend to byte their food
How do people relate to movies now, when they're on portable devices or streaming them? It's not as much about going to the movies. That experience has changed.
almost all i do is talk and sing. people love me and take me with them everywhere. i reach people all around the world and tell them what they want. they rely on me for anything and i can even save their life and yet i dont have a mouth, what am i?
I have inspiration and feelings of being alive most every day I live.
Arnold Swarchanager has a long one Jamie Fox has a short one the Pope can't use it Maddona doesn't have one what is it?
Yeah, I mean the material, directors, the other cast, and if you think you can do something with the character then you do it and go from there. I am looking forward to doing some smaller movies.
And I'm walking along and we're laughing, kidding, joking, and see he understood the leader, the one we called the leader, had some knowledge of English, although limited.
A taxi driver crossed a red light. A police officer was there but didn't confront the driver. Why?
A red ship and a blue ship crashed on an island together the survivors were marooned.
And they didn't have to get into a lot of legal speak or talk ER terms, they were real people. I think that's why so many actresses were attracted to it. And it was just about problems that you could identify with so much, right off the bat.
Beauty ought to look a little surprised: it is the emotion that best suits her face. The beauty who does not look surprised, who accepts her position as her due - she reminds us too much of a prima donna.
Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.
During a wind storm, a roaster goes to the top of a house and lays an egg. Which way does the egg fall? North, west, east, or south?
We've lost touch and allowed technology to take precedence over organic nature. But let's not forget that those microchips in our computers came from elements of the earth.
Why was the baby ant confused?
What's my favourite food? One you order out.
What kind of jackets do Audiophiles wear? FLAC jackets
As a mom I know that raising children is the hardest job there is.
Two coins make 11p. One isnt a 10p and one isnt a 1p. What are the two coins? ps. They are real coins and not made up ones.
Accept that all of us can be hurt, that all of us can and surely will at times fail. Other vulnerabilities, like being embarrassed or risking love, can be terrifying, too. I think we should follow a simple rule: if we can take the worst, take the risk.
For a modern woman it is important to be supported and that there is equality in every aspect, and that it's not two halves that make a whole - it's two wholes that make a whole.
a was walkin he hit a bar but he was notunconsious before he hit the bar.How could this be
I saw an all frog production of Frozen yesterday... It was toad-aly cool!
Any fool knows that bravado is always a cover-up for insecurity. That's the truth. And on that note, I'll say goodnight. God love you.
Go hang-gliding
It's not my job to dream your dreams. It's my job to make your dreams become a reality.
Solve this. What does this mean? Besickd
Tears of joy are like the summer rain drops pierced by sunbeams.
To be clever enough to get all that money, one must be stupid enough to want it.
There are only 12 of these in the world but everyone has one. What's the answer?
In high school, during marathon phone conversations, cheap pizza dinners and long suburban car rides, I began to fall for boys because of who they actually were, or at least who I thought they might become.
Dine in the Dark
My mom was a professional. My dad and mom met each other in a movie called 'New Faces of 1937.' My mom went under the name Thelma Leeds, and she did a few movies, and she was really a great singer, and when she married my dad and started to have a family, she sang at parties.
Why did the chicken go to the playground?
Which word in the English language becomes shorter when it is lengthened?
Unconditional war can no longer lead to unconditional victory. It can no longer serve to settle disputes... can no longer be of concern to great powers alone.