I had to take my makeup off at work every night. I wasn't allowed to do it at home because my mom said that when your work day is done, you're done with work.
When a parent shows up with an attitude of entitlement, understand that under it is a boatload of anxiety.
Thou art my single day, God lends to leaven What were all earth else, with a feel of heaven.
There are two twins,twin 1 robbed a bank.Twin 2 tried to stop twin 1.They were sent to court,but the juge said that he couldn't send twin 1 to jail.Why?
This guy living on the 20th floor in an apartment building got up early each morning to go to work in a downtown store. He always went into the elevator on the 20th floor and rode down to the entrance (1st floor). When he came home he always rode the elevator from the entrance and up to the 8th floor. He walked out of the elevator and walked the stairs up to his apartment on the 20th floor. Why don't he take the elevator all the way up to his apartment?
And the greatest lesson that mom ever taught me though was this one. She told me there would be times in your life when you have to choose between being loved and being respected. Now she said to always pick being respected.
Why can't Kevin Laroche, who is now living in Canada, not be buried in the USA?
It will always be a battle a day between those who want maximum change and those who want to maintain the status quo.
For a Jewish Puritan of the middle class, the novel is serious, the novel is work, the novel is conscientious application why, the novel is practically the retail business all over again.
What did the German physicist use to drink his beer? Ein stein.
As for gun control advocates, I have no hope whatever that any facts whatever will make the slightest dent in their thinking - or lack of thinking.
two men are trapped inside four brick walls. All there is in the room includes a door that is locked from the outside, a bullet proof window that is locked from the outside. the thing that locks the window is a stick that is movable if you apply a great force. Finally lastly in the room is a fallen brick. After 15 minutes the two men got out. How is this possible?
They are fetched in the dark with no call. They are taken in the light with out be stolen. What are they?
If I ever have sex with someone I might be able to develop a sense of humor.
Gratitude is merely the secret hope of further favors.
18=H. on a G.C.
A good actor is someone who knows how to take the part and make it real and make it honest and be effective in it. If it's in a funny movie and, as long as they are cast in an appropriate way, humor will come from it.
Celebrate Chinese New Year in China
Courage is simply the willingness to be afraid and act anyway.
What goes in like water and comes out like rock? what am I?
I would say my greatest achievement in life right now - my greatest achievement period is - and I'm still trying to achieve it - is to be a wonderful father to my kids.
Ride on a bull machine
Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.
A petshop owner had a parrot with a sign on its cage that said "Parrot repeats everything it hears." A young man bought the parrot and for two weeks he spoke to it and it didn't say a word. He returned the parrot but the shopkeeper said he never lied about the parrot. How can this be?
No matter how dark the moment, love and hope are always possible.
What is big and heavy and sounds like mouses.
what goes black white black white black white black white?
I think money is essential to happiness and right now I wouldn't want to be anyone other than Wilbur Smith - I've had a fantastic life, rewarded far more heavily than I deserve. Maybe I'd like to be J. K. Rowling, but I'll settle for second best.
What happens when breed a shark and snowman? You get a frostbite!
The President regards the Japanese as a brave people but courage, though useful in time of war, is subordinate to knowledge of arts hence, courage without such knowledge is not to be highly esteemed.
I am black as night, But filled with light. I can be seen, Even through a screen. I hold many secrets, Waiting for them to be discovered. What am I?
How do you get out of a room that has no windows and the door is locked and all there is in the room is a table and a mirror?
Face like a tree Skin like the sea A great beast i be But vermin frghten me
You have no idea how humiliating it was, as a boy, to suddenly have all your clothes, your toys, snatched by the bailiff. I mean we were a middle-class family, it's not as if it was happening up and down the street. It made me ashamed, I felt dirty.
How much does a pirate earing cost? A buccaneer
What kind of pants does Super Mario wear? Denim Denim Denim
I get so frustrated when people tell me it's unrealistic to create an eight-month emergency savings fund, or have money saved for a home down payment, or pay off their $5,000 credit card balance.
When you read about a car crash in which two or three youngsters are killed, do you pause to dwell on the amount of love and treasure and patience parents poured into bodies no longer suitable for open caskets?
John had only $2, but he needed $3 for his cab fare home. He went to a pawn shop and pawned his $2 for $1.50. John then bumped into Dan and told him that he would sell him his $2 pawn ticket for $1.50. Dan agreed. Since John started out with $2, and he ended up with $3, who is out the extra dollar and why?
Singing
Art is the beautiful way of doing things. Science is the effective way of doing things. Business is the economic way of doing things.
In England, the queen had two twins. They were born at exactly the same time and the same place. One was intelligent, responsible and everyone loved this child. The other, however, was stupid and irresponsible and everyone hated him. Although, when it was time to choose the heir, they chose the latter instead. Why wasn't the intelligent one chosen? Clues: 1.The intelligent one did not die, was injured or sent away in prison or overseas. 2. The queen agreed and was perfectly happy and fine with it. 3. The latter had not bribed, and it was a fair agreement.
As a Member of Congress, I've continued my family's tradition of focusing on education.
Climb to the top of St. Paul’s Cathedral
A woman was reading in the basement of her house when her husband walked by and, thinking that the basement was empty, switched off the light and closed the door. The woman paused in her reading for a moment, then continued. there were no lamps, flashlights, windows, or any other form of light in the basement. The light that her husband switched off never came back on. How is this possible?
What's the difference between me and a calendar? A calendar has dates. #foreveralone
I've never had anything but the freedom to do what I wanted just as long as it made me happy.
A man road in to town on his horse on Friday and 3 days later he left on Friday how's that possible.
Freedom is an indivisible word. If we want to enjoy it, and fight for it, we must be prepared to extend it to everyone, whether they are rich or poor, whether they agree with us or not, no matter what their race or the color of their skin.
Forwards I'm heavy, but backwards I'm not. What am I?
To become truly immortal, a work of art must escape all human limits: logic and common sense will only interfere. But once these barriers are broken, it will enter the realms of childhood visions and dreams.
Up against the wall he knew it was over.
3 B M, S H T R ( the letter stand for a word )
Decisiveness is a characteristic of high-performing men and women. Almost any decision is better than no decision at all.
I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.
What crawls on 4 legs in the morning, 2 in the afternoon, and 3 in the eavining
It had not occurred to me that marriage requires the same effort as a career. And unlike a career, marriage requires a joint effort.
When your mom says, "Say the magic word". What should you say?
Little men with little minds and little imaginations go through life in little ruts, smugly resisting all changes which would jar their little worlds.
Close to the words of life stay I, But I wither, wane, and grow dry.
What do you call a car that eats other cars? A carnivore.
I got into shape because I took kick-boxing lessons every day to prepare for a fight scene with Taylor Lautner. I really wanted to lie down and eat Chinese food, but I kick-boxed every morning and ran. If someone was filming you with your kit off, you'd do the same thing.
A boy and a Docter went fishing. The boy was the Docters son but the Docter wasn't the boys father. Who is the Docter?
I've watched my peers get better with age and hoped that would happen with me.
A woman walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. The bartender takes out his gun, points it to her head, and then puts it away. The lady kisses him on the cheek and then leaves. What caused this?
We must pay greater attention to keeping our bodies and minds healthy and able to heal. Yet we are making it difficult for our defences to work. We allow things to be sold that should not be called food. Many have no nutritive value and lead to obesity, salt imbalance, and allergies.
Which is heavier, a pound of feathers or a pound of rocks?
Survival requires us to leave our prejudices at home. It's about doing whatever it takes - and ultimately those with the biggest heart will win.
What's the longest word in the dictionary? "Smiles" because there is a mile between each S!
add 1 1 1 1 5 using +/- and using each digit only once. the final answer should be 24
I belong to you. But everyone else uses me more than you use me. What am I?
Emergency health care for illegal aliens along the southwestern border is already costing area hospitals $200 million a year, with perhaps another $100 million in extended care costs.
What is so fragile that when you speak it, it breaks?
I know from my own personal experience. I was bullied in middle school and high school and went through my fair share of hard times thereafter. Also, one of my really good friends committed suicide when I was in high school.
The conversion of agnostic High Tories to the Anglican church is always rather suspect. It seems too pat and predictable, too clearly a matter of politics rather than faith.
Where water flows upwards I there reside; behind humans' creation is where I do hide While inside I dream of how up I could fly and rising outside I see all under the sky Where am I?
In West Virginia, the most vulnerable people we have are people who get up every morning and go to work.
What's black, but it's red when it's green?
can a man marry his widow's sister?
A little learning is a dangerous thing Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring.
If you're looking for can-do, earthy-crunchy attitude then you've got to go to Wisconsin.
If a rooster laid 11 eggs and the farmer took 5 of them and another rooster laid 14 eggs and 5 of them were rotten, how many eggs were left
I don't get angry very often. I lose my temper rarely. And when I do, there's always a legitimate cause. Normally I have a great lightness of being. I take things in a very happy, amused way.
I am small but I use to be big.I have a spine, but I have no bones. What am I?
Can anyone understand how it is to have lived in the White House and then, suddenly, to be living alone as the President's widow?
what is more powerful than god, the rich need it, the poor have it, and if you eat it you will die.
My mom had this romantic notion of her children playing classical music. The idea is you learn it when you're still learning language. It's using the same part of the brain.
There is a man who had a normal life and was sick of it. One day he was siting around at his house and he yelled out 'WHY! CANT I BE FAMOUS!' and POOF! there's the devil! He says 'i can make you the most famous man in the world and all you have to do is sell me your soul'. Ofcourse the man agreed and the Devil made him famous. Well a few days later the man is sick of his new life and wants his old life back. So he yells for the devil and the devil poofs in again. 'What do you want!?' and the man says, 'I want my old life back!!' so the devil said. 'Fine!, if you can tell me the one thing i cant do i'll give back your soul and your old life, but! i have to tell you, i can be anywhere do anything and be anything i want. so the man thinks and then leans in and wispers in the devils ear and with a heavy sigh the devil snaps his fingers and the man has his old life back. What did he say the devil cant do?
How do you turn soup into gold? You add 24 carats!
you are going along a road to saltlake city and see at the end of the it that there are two men and two roads .one of the men is a liar (he is standing next to the wrong road). and one of them is telling the truth(he is standing next to the right road)what question do you ask both of them. it has to the same question and you are ony aloud to ask one question.
Together we can make a world where cancer no longer means living with fear, without hope, or worse.
George wrote Taxman, and I played guitar on it. He wrote it in anger at finding out what the taxman did. He had never known before then what could happen to your money.
Everyday I see me. I can't make it stopfor it is nearly in every step I take. What am I?